Hey guys, I don't know what to do. I try so hard to tell myself that I'm fine the way I am, gay. I try to tell myself I'm normal and that nothing is wrong with me. But I can't, I can't get it to stick. I see movies with regular couples and I feel bad because I can't have that, like I will always be different in others eyes. I see normal guys mess around and cally each other gay, and I try to let it not get to me, but it does. Like, what if they knew? I hate how commonly it's used as a insult. I'm even in my schools GSA so I could try to feel better, but nothing. Is there a way I can feel better about myself? I've heard from people that if I get a boyfriend then I just won't care, however how am I supposed to get a boyfriend when I'm not even out to my parents. I'm just having major self confidence issues that I don't know how to deal with. What can I do? :help:
I used to feel like this all the time a while ago but I realized that all that worry was for nothing. I cared too much what other people thought of me and tried to change myself so people would like me. There's nothing wrong with you, You just happen to like Guys not girls, Like a lot of other people. Remember that Nobody is Normal, There's no such thing as normal because everybody is different. As for the Gay insults, most of the time people don't realize what they're saying when they use gay as a negative word. They are just ignorant. If I were you I'd work on your self confidence issues before trying to pursue a relationship. Come out to your parents when you're ready. Being Gay is completely fine and only a small part of who you are. Goodluck, I hope everything works out. :icon_bigg
I find my self-confidence takes a boost when I achieve something. Anything. Try to do things which give you this accomplished feeling. Organize all your DVDs. Build a doghouse. Take up jogging. While unrelated to your sexuality, they will make you feel better and this will spill over into other areas of your life.
I agree with Really. If you have other outside pursuits, try focusing on those. Art projects, athletics, science competitions, even video games. Find other areas to focus your energies, set goals and look to achieve them.
I do play a lot a video games, most the time to distract myself from the thoughts and I usually feel pretty good after I get done. I know that when they use it as a negative term they don't mean but it still bothers me. I know I'm definitely not ready to come out to my parents, especially since they might blow up. I don't have to worry about even trying to get a boyfriend considering there are no gay guys my age let alone someone who would like me. Thanks for the advice you guys. Still don't know what to do for a permanent solution though.
A permanent solution might require some form of therapy or possibly a group support situation, if you can find one. As for nobody liking you, you'll find people have all sorts of tastes and you'll certainly be someone's. Just keep you eyes peeled.
Both ideas for the permanent solution sound great...except how would I do either with out my parents finding out? I don't want to them to know yet. Especially if there is a chance that they will explode.
No need to tell them why you want to go, just explain your feeling down and would like someone to talk to?
I used to be like this. All I can say is that it takes time. Self-confidence doesn't just appear overnight. As you get older, you learn to accept yourself more and more and it's a gradual process
Do fun stuff with friends Organize your stuff or finish a project or something. Buy a cool thing. Find a new outfit. Eat some great food. Watch a movie you would like.
