Is it just me or the idea of a soul mate a bad idea. Just bare with me. A soul mate means you have such a deep connection with that person. They get you and you have all the same interests, and you don't have to make any sacrifices because they truly are the perfect fit for you. It's fate. But all of this sounds like a terrible recipe for malcontent. Here's why: You are not willing to make any compromises. Seeing as they are your soul mate you should be perfect for each other. Perfection does not equal compromises. The smallest mistake will have you thinking that they are not your soul mate. So they don't pick up the socks or they didn't compliment you on the way you made dessert. That automatically means that they are not your soul mate. It will also have you jumping from one relationship to the next as a serial monogamist because that "first time feeling of sparks" does not last forever. love matures. It's natural. But if they were truly your soul mate then they would be able to ignite that feeling in you every time you see them. For me the idea of soul mates is cruel. People can click without having to be soul mates, and no relationship has ever or will ever be perfect. Thoughts on this matter? Agree? Disagree?
I agree with you. I don't think there is this particular 'the one' waiting out there, rather, I think there are lots of good people out there who one could be compatible with. Even meeting one of those is challenging, enough.
Hmm, seems you've a few misconceptions First I don't think soul mates need be like twins or something. Your soulmate completes you, this implies that he/she has stuff you don't. Their strengths are your weaknesses and your strengths are their weaknesses. They bring something to the table you lack, but want/need. You can have different hobbies n interests...this gives each other something new to learn and explore, for you'd want to engage in the hobbies of your other half. Hmm maybe I'm weird but I compromise with myself from time to time, so I don't see why there wouldn't be compromise with my soulmate. You've had to survive on your own without your other half for a long time, so naturally even as soulmates there'd be compromise n adjustments. I'm sorry but we are imperfect beings even when we're whole, mistakes will happen. Its not about the mistake so much but rather what they do to make amends...BTW I'm talking Lil mistakes, not like cheating. Soulmates aren't all bout that fiery spark of love's first passions...they are happy just being with their other half. There's a completeness, wholeness, contented feeling. Not saying the passion dies either...no it just becomes an ever present hum. But, what do I know? I'm only in my first ever romantic relationship but I've always believed in soul mates. I believe I've found mine. I'd do anything just to be in her presence, even as she busily works on her truck or something.
Under that specific definition, I understand those sentiments, but I wouldn't consider that definition to be universal to everyone who references a soul mate. I have always been under the impression that the concept was more based around finding a mate that you connected with on a level that you could imagine being lifelong. Experiencing a perfect or near perfect connection is rarely about having the same interests or being the same type of person, rather each being individuals, who together, compliment each other. I do see what you are saying. I am just saying that it might be less about the concept and more about how people take that concept and run with it.
As an old fashioned romantic, I am one for thinking there is a soul mate for myself, however I am not under an illusions that you still don't need to work at a relationship and there might be issues still that you need to work for if you wanna stay in the relationship.
All relationships require give and take. I like the idea of having a "soul mate", but as others have said, it's a concept that does not eliminate the need to work are a relationship in order for a relationship to be successful.
I'm not making these comments out of scorn or a failed relationship. I only make them because from time to time you run into that one person that has such unbelievably high standards. Fate is another cruel idea because it implies we have no control over our life. What happens is like a book and we are nothing more than the readers. We can't change the text of it. I do believe that people can connect and that there should always be give and take. That is what makes a relationship special. Its when you take soul mates to the extreme that it gets to be a bad idea. But I do believe that people can click so closely, without being identical twins with the same interest, but I guess I just don't like the label of "soul mates". Why can't you call them your husband/wife/partner/lover? It's the label itself that causes most of the trouble.
I tend to agree with the OP. I have mentioned this in an earlier post, worth repeating here. A soul-mate can be conceived as a mirror, someone just like you, someone who sees everything as you do, to the point of completing your sentences. My best friend is my soul-mate, he knows me to my core and has known me for 42 years, I trust him implicitly, we have great conversations, etc. Why wouldn't this type of person also be the perfect partner? A partner or spouse serves another function. This may be someone who may not completely "get" you (although the more the better) but rather is someone who brings out the best in you. A soul-mate will not do that, he will mirror you, support you no matter what; a partner, on the other hand will challenge you, because he or she sees, and loves, what you can become, because he or she loves the potential you, and wants to be part of that evolution. Such a partner also expects that you would also challenge them to be better. I suspect that after some time, an overlap develops between soul-mate and partner in the same person, and that, to me, is a beautiful development...
I don't believe in "one, true love", but I do think there are certain people that are soul mates in the sense that they complete you. There's some research suggesting that even though "opposites attract", people often have happier relationships with those who have similar interests/personalities.
