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I feel I'll never be accepted

Discussion in 'General Support and Advice' started by rcollinz13, Nov 17, 2014.

  1. rcollinz13

    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Apr 28, 2013
    Messages:
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    Location:
    Ontario, Canada
    Gender:
    Male
    Sexual Orientation:
    Gay
    Recently, I was browsing my Facebook new feed when I noticed something. Another one of my friends is engaged to get married. The comments on the status were full of congratulations, I'm happy for you, and best wishes for the two. I don't want to their to be any confusion here. I am happy for them, and I wish them nothing but the best. However, it made me start to wonder if I will ever be happily married in the future with that kind of support from my friends and family. I, like many other people, come from a strictly Christian background. My parents are heavily involved in their church. My Uncle is a pastor and missionary. I feel like a lot of my life I have desperately tried to hold onto any little bit of myself that would convince me I'm straight because it would be easier than dealing with the inevitable disappointment of my parents. It's also the constant fear of losing my friends, being judged by people, and having my relations with other people forever changed. All my life I've had this idea that only straight relationships are normal drilled into my head that I start believing it myself. When that happens I just spiral into this vortex of negative emotions that tell me I'm abnormal and a deviant of a civilised society. It's been getting worse lately, so I wrote this just to get these thoughts out of my head. If you have read the whole thing, thanks for listening. Cheers.
     
  2. RAdam

    Full Member

    Joined:
    Aug 4, 2014
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    Location:
    The Dutchlands
    I too have wished to be straight so many times just to make things easier but that's not gonna happen so we've gotta accept our gayness which isn't a bad thing!!
    Yeah religion makes things more difficult especially if you're family is strict believers. Have you ever tried finding out what your family and friends think of gay people, I see you're out to some friends how did they react and could they support you ?
    I have seen that in the US and Canada you have a lot, a lot! of support groups for LGBT people maybe check one of those out and see if you can find some people in the same boat. In the end its about your happiness before theirs, you gotta be selfish in these situations and you might not convince them that being gay is OK but they'll have to deal with reality one way or another. Make sure you're honest with them and I would also tell them how you've struggled and that you have given being straight plenty of thought but you're not created that way and it has been eating you up since you found out. Hopefully they'll realise what a hard time you've been having and support you, family first right?