I went home for Thanksgiving this week . And I spent a lot of time with my mother, time that encased a lot of tension. And one day that tension exploded. She called my love life a phase. And I began to grind my teeth together. She told me "I just haven't met the right guy yet" and that "I wasn't even trying to." And a sigh escaped my lips. She said that my sexual orientation was not something that she could approve of. And my mouth went dry. My lips parted when she said that I should keep it hidden within my small town "for my own good." But then she described the girl I loved as a choice. And I began to scream. I screamed about lack choice And how I was born to love the girl who held my heart. I raged that if she loved me as she claimed that she would have to love ALL of me. I tore into her hatred for a group of people that she didn't even understand. I screeched with years of pain ringing in my voice. And... I. Couldn't. Stop. If I had ever hurt that badly before that I had surely never let loose like that. I howled words to protect myself, protect my girlfriend, and to protect everyone that I had ever come in contact with that could identify like me. I snarled and wrapped my beliefs and new found self-love around myself like an armor. I created a symphony of angry words and intermingling tears. I fought for myself. Today I feel war-torn. Today, I feel nothing but pride. Because yesterday... Years of yesterdays I could not even manage to bring a whisper to my lips. But now... I can scream.
It's called standing up for what you believe in and good for you. (*hug*) Even if it was a bit more explosive than you were expecting!
I'm sorry they can't be accepting, but I support you standing up for yourself! I myself am hiding from two Homophobic people in my life, and I wish could be a man and stand up for myself. However, small stories like yours right here make me happy and I really hope your mother doesn't try to hurt you any further with these slanderous words! People have this fixed mindset, and I hate that. Some turn around, and I just hope she does.
