For People Contemplating Suicide or are in pain about their sexuality

Suicide is never the answer, in high school at grade 10, I once contemplated killing myself, I was fairly gruesome at that time, I would often go to the kitchen and grab a chef's knife to plunge into my heart. I never did do it though because I would just start crying like crazy and my parents often caught me before I did it.

I am glad I did not kill myself because now I am a very happy person because being gay is not a horrible thing. Being gay is being who you are. A gay man is a man who loves other men and I do love other men, it is a feeling that I've never honestly felt until I started to come out albeit very slowly. I now think of a relationship and for the first time I'm not saying that It's hopeless, I'm saying that I will find another guy and I look forward to all the things we would do, be it specific sexual acts, going to the cinemas and going to a restaurant, watching a movie marathon in the lounge and even just walking out the house to go to work and saying goodbye to my partner for the day. The thing is that person will be a man and never a woman.

This is what you guys or girls will look forward to in the future if you do not give in to yourselves, your days of suicidal thoughts may be long and it may not seem like you'll ever be happy, but do not give in to those feelings, those feelings are the demons inside all of us, when on the other side of this time, there are the angels that will come out and bring thoughts of happiness and love. In fact for all the times I went through my demonic side was stronger than my angelic side and it remained with me through all of high school as a reminder of my depression. Only now has my angelic side finally dominated the dark thoughts of which I held for over 4/5 years.

But do not fear who you are either because there is no such thing as normal, people can pretend to be normal or they can be who they really are. The people who are really themselves are the people who are different much like the LGBT community. Some straight people are different as they have honestly accepted that they do not have to be the sheep like everyone else is.

Just take the time to read this and see how I have changed from the dark suicidal person to the happy and proud homosexual man. The same applies to all of the LGBT community because if I can become the person I am today, you can as well.

Just never give up and never give in because you are a man or woman or transgender person and you know what people are jealous that you have the guts to be who you are. So therefore they try and bring you down. There is nothing wrong with being whoever you are, but there is something wrong if you want to kill yourself, just ask yourself the question, why. why take the quick and short route when you can take a longer and harder route which will eventually lead to complete happiness. (This happiness is better than any other feeling you will have, it will make you feel so alive and you will begin to not give a damn about what others think) and I am soon to be heading towards not giving a damn about what all the heterosexual guys think about me. (not all of them obviously, there are some who are really nice people).

So just don't kill yourself because in the far future you will be happy you did not take your own life. I know the feelings as to which you guys feel, but I also know the feelings of the future as well. I am happier than ever before and I know that maybe I might get my heart broken a few times but those dark moments in my past will just make me pick myself back up and keep going, but I can see that person in my future who will make me so incredibly happy that it will seem like a dream.

Please do not do it if you are thinking about it and just keep pushing on through with help from this forum and others you will push through easier than if you just keep it to yourself.