1. This site uses cookies. By continuing to use this site, you are agreeing to our use of cookies. Learn More.

What do I do?

Discussion in 'General Support and Advice' started by Priceless, Jan 4, 2015.

  1. Priceless

    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Jan 3, 2015
    Messages:
    56
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    UK
    Gender:
    Male
    All my life, I have always wanted kids and actually go through the birth process (Not myself because I'm a guy, but, oh well you get the point!). But now... after really thinking about it, I still like girls. I still imagine myself with them, but also imagine myself with guys. And I imagine myself more with guys than girls as of now, but I still always had this feeling of wanting to have kids.

    Of course there is always adoption, and not saying I won't love that kid to death if it comes to that, I still want to go through the real process of having a real kid.

    So, I'm asking you all... What do I do? There's still a chance that I could end up with a girl, but that dream is slowly falling apart like pieces of a puzzle. Piece by piece, the beautiful picture I painted in my mind is falling apart and I'm not ready to get rid of the puzzle I've made just yet.
     
  2. mapleluv

    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Dec 2, 2014
    Messages:
    116
    Likes Received:
    0
    Gender:
    Female
    Well, if you do end up with a man, you can always just have a close relationship with a surrogate mother. That way you can still be a part of the whole pregnancy/birth process & the child can even be genetically yours.

    Know that you're not alone. (*hug*) Giving up the dream can be hard. I almost married a man just so I could have the "traditional" family I always wanted; but I (thankfully) realized that even if I did have that, it would never make me happy. Love is what makes a family. That's where to start from.
     
  3. Priceless

    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Jan 3, 2015
    Messages:
    56
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    UK
    Gender:
    Male
    That's actually really helpful, thank you! :slight_smile:
     
  4. mapleluv

    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Dec 2, 2014
    Messages:
    116
    Likes Received:
    0
    Gender:
    Female
    No problem! :icon_bigg

    Another thing that really helped me & might help you would be to meet & hang out with some same-sex couples with children. That way you can see that they really are just normal families, even if they look a little different or were made a little differenly than people typically think of.
     
  5. RushfordJr

    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Jan 4, 2015
    Messages:
    5
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Clackmannanshire
    Gender:
    Male
    Sexual Orientation:
    Gay
    Hi there mate. I know the exact same feeling you're going through right now. I'm not interested in girls/woman as I'm 100% gay, but I always had the same plan in my head. I have a large family and all of my mother and fathers brothers/sisters have multiple children who some are now having grandchildren. Being an only child made the situation for me to come out that much harder as I felt at the time I couldn't give my mother and father what they really wanted, which was grandchildren.

    But, as Mapleluv said there is always surrogates and adoption like I've considered to myself as well.

    Life is hard enough without having to deal with extra stress, so try not to worry about it. The way I looked at it was, it's something I'll have to deal with and learn how to adapt my future towards the situation I'm in now, instead of dwelling on how bad it might seem.

    Hope this might have helped some.
     
  6. Priceless

    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Jan 3, 2015
    Messages:
    56
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    UK
    Gender:
    Male
    Wow, thank you both tremendously. I thought I may have been alone in this, but I see that's not the case. What you've said has actually really helped me. :slight_smile: