Hey So I get told this a lot or well at the very least variations on it. But I keep thinking to myself "Is it such a bad thing to want a relationship". I mean am not actively looking but at the same time I constantly feel as though I missing out on that vital part of life. I know, I know relationships are not the be all and end all and to be quite frank I have this sneaky suspicion that when relationship does happen I'll be like "is that it, all that fuss I made and that's it" kinda thing. Yeah I get a little envious sometimes of those that have had relationships before me but I dunno. The repeated idea that "wanting a relationship" is a bad thing doesn't sit well with me. I mean I want to love someone like that, someone to talk to, share things with and all that other boyfriend & boyfriend stuff. Is that such a bad thing? Really?
No, Everyone wants to be loved. I dont see anything wrong with you wanting a guy to call yours. I want a relationship myself to do the things you stated and then some... But no it isnt a bad thing and fuck the people that say it is
Wanting to have a relationship isn't a bad thing. Feeling like you won't be happy unless you have one is. One of the toughest things for many people to get their hands around is the idea that you can only love another person as much as you love yourself. So before you can be in a healthy, emotionally connected and intimate relationship, you have to be able to love yourself... which also means being able to be happy by yourself. Once you're at that place, then being in a relationship will take on a whole different level of depth and meaning.
Agree with the other posters. It's definitely not a bad thing to want a relationship, but as with anything in moderation. If it gets to the point where you're so fixated on a relationship that you convince yourself you can't be complete or happy without one, that is bad. Maybe the people who are telling you wanting a relationship is bad are confusing the former with the latter, but they're very different. Everyone wants to be loved, but some end up feeling like they're somehow lesser or worthless if they're not in a relationship. Tl;dr it really depends on why you want a relationship. If it's to share yourself with another person, that's great! If you have a feeling that you are inferior unless you have a relationship- and use relationships to "fill the void" - that's not great.
I don't know, when I think about stuff like this my head spins. It always seems like relationships find people who are just as happy without one, probably because they make the best decisions as they don't feel the pressure to find somebody. Honestly when I long for a relationship I tend to look at all the reasons why I've never had one, and to be honest I've grown to really hate myself on a certain level because of that. Now I'm trying to be like those people who I see as deserving of a relationship, that's to say that they're "open" to one and not "chasing" one, but it's still really hard for me to be open to the possibility of a relationship when I still can't just be happy alone. So, at the moment I guess I feel like it's a bad thing to really "want" a relationship, because it can lead to a bad train of thought, but I guess if you want responsibly then no harm done.
