I have a similar problem, but what I would do is just ask it outright. You will know when it's the right time, but try not to do it when she's busy, and don't let the conversation end until you're ready. Be assertive, confident, and certain. If she senses hesitance, she may try to use that against you. Easier said than done, I know, but it's important. I'm not sure what's your situation, but if she's completely against it, ask why and talk out each individual point with her. Be patient and try not to feel frustrated, upset, or hurt by what she says. Ultimately, it's your choice. I came out to my friend even though my mother said not to. She doesn't know yet and I don't plan on telling her, so, if you do want to come out, go ahead. She's not the one living your life. This is yours to live.
Ask your mum? You don't need to ask her. You can come out whenever you want, that's no one elses decision to make.
Who are you wanting to come out to? It's impossible for anyone else to know unless that person tells someone, which, in that case, I don't think you should come out to them at all.
Punishments are temporary, and if you are punished it's for telling the truth and doing nothing wrong, so it'll be her that's in the wrong.
I want to come out to Pretty much everyone at church and my entire family. Also for her punishments aren't temporary at all.
Do you know why she is not letting you to come out? If it is because she love you so much that she afraid to let you out and get hurt, then she can be convinced by showing you are strong enough to take on whatever is thrown at you. But if she is preventing you due to her belief, or because you will taint the name of the family, then that is a different case, you probably won't get through her. She might even try conversion method to "fix you". Better plan ahead and find a way to survive in that environment. Possibly find an LGBT support group soon and ask them for help.
RainDreamer's right. Although it's tempting and sometimes relieving to come out, try to think of the long term consequences first, especially ones regarding your safety.
It's because I'm only 13 and it would be a "Horrible Mistake" and "The worst thing I could ever do/The worst chocie I could possibly make". . So basically it would taint the familys nameand I live in a small christian town in. Southwestern PA.
Maybe work on getting your mother to accept and support you before you come out. Do you have any particular reason why you want to come out to everyone? Are they supportive of LGBT+ people?
I want to come out becuase I ave way more than just my sexuality that I have to hide. I'm not sure if thetpy're souptortive or not. Also my mom will never love nd aaccept mes.
Although you know your mother better than anyone else will, you don't exactly know if that's true. Never is a long time. There will always be a possibility that she will change her views, but if she truly doesn't, know that she doesn't control your life. Going back to the original question, if she thinks it will "bring shame to the family," then explain to her how people are smart enough to realize that one person is not the representation of an entire family. If she's willing to listen, then explain to her how much it means to you and why you want to. You should get a general gist of their opinions, however, before you do anything. If they end up being anti-LGBT+, it's probably a bad idea to come out right now.
Usually, if a mother place "family name" over the well being of their child, I kind of doubt that she would be someone who listen to reasons like "one person is not a representation of a whole family." That usually backfire. I would say, play it safe. Find friends you can truly trust. You can come out with them. But don't let your mother know, no matter what.
