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Really scared my dad will find out about me

Discussion in 'General Support and Advice' started by suchconfusion, Apr 3, 2015.

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  1. suchconfusion

    suchconfusion
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    Hey guys!! So, both of my parents are pretty religious. Both of them love me, but I suppose my dad loves me slightly less, if that plays a factor... Anyway, my dad has always been strict about me being social and hanging out with people, but he's been letting up a little as I get older. Recently, I noticed he's made some low key comments on how I dress tomboyishly or don't dress in a feminine way. I'm really afraid he's going to suspect that I'm a lesbian or something along those lines. I've always wondered if he snoops my texts, but i've mentioned being bisexual and had long conversations with friends on there about it, so he could always go looking through my phone record if it crosses his mind (I think he can pull them up somewhere???). If he finds out, I'm terrified he'll completely shut me down and not let me see/talk with any of my friends, or watch me like a hawk since they're all girls and I could have "relationships" with any one of them. He'll completely cage me in socially and make me miserable. And worst, occasionally, I noticed he's very spiteful towards homosexuals, making comments about them with an underlying derrogatory tone. I'm so nervous about it, especially since I've recently intentionally started dressing in a much more tomboyish/masculine way.
    In all honesty, I was never going to tell him. Ever. Because sometimes people just know how their parents will react, and I know he'll be completely outraged and he'll cut off ties with me or worst. That shit just won't fly with him, mostly due to upbringing and religion. It's so anxiety inducing :confused::icon_sad: And I don't want to have to be so careful about who I am, but I've honestly left lots of tracks online and he wouldn't have to work much to find them. :/
    I guess this was more of a rant. It's just been bothering me SO MUCH recently, especially since I feel like I live a double life, since all of my good friends know and I'm pretty open about it at school. But any advice would be great :lol: I feel like this is something a lot of people go through. Thank guys!
     
    #1 suchconfusion, Apr 3, 2015
  2. EpicConfusion

    EpicConfusion
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    I'm sorry you're in that situation :/ A good place to start is to remove all the online "tracks" that you can and make sure you're relatively anonymous. Sorry I can't really offer any advice becahse I haven't ever had to be in that situation. If you need to talk about anything, I would be glad to chat.
     
    #2 EpicConfusion, Apr 5, 2015
  3. suchconfusion

    suchconfusion
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    Agh thanks so much :/ I'd love to but generally I'm not sure where I left them. They're scattered across the universe. But I'll try my best
     
    #3 suchconfusion, Apr 7, 2015
  4. RainDreamer

    RainDreamer
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    For the online track part - what kind of track it is? If it is something that is attached to your personal information, like facebook accounts that he knows you have or have your image, well, that is going to be hard.

    You can try burning bridges and sacrifice such accounts: remove all traceable information first, then making it seems like your account got hacked, copy-paste spam bot messages and spam the whole thing until it get shut down, no one will care about digging a spam bot account, and you can always claim it is the hacker that wrote the thing before it even if your dad did bother to do that.

    Other things:
    - Keep your history cleaned often
    - Change passwords every few months: have a set of passwords, randomly choose one on rotation.
    - Dual identities: One (or more) online identity where you can talk like this with us, and other as decoy, using your real information.
     
    #4 RainDreamer, Apr 8, 2015
  5. suchconfusion

    suchconfusion
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    TRUE TRUE thank you!!
     
    #5 suchconfusion, Apr 8, 2015
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