Not sure if this will be a triggering subject or not, but wasn't sure where else to ask. To anyone who's called a suicide hotline and benefited from it, how were your experiences? Was there any concern it'd be insincere since it's their "job" to console people and how did you overcome it? Sometimes I think of contacting, but that's part of what holds me back. Feels awkward, to say the least, relying on a complete stranger to help rid such thoughts.
I have honestly never used a suicide hotline but certainly link people to them all the time and they are apparently beneficial (at least the major Australian one is). How you thought about the Trevor Project? It is a largely ran suicide prevention organisation ran throughout the USA typically for teens but I am sure it works for everyone. I wish you the best and hope that someone can give more detail and an experienced response -Bonnie<3
I've never considered the Trevor Project, partly because I haven't seriously thought of contacting such a line and also because any inclination to do so isn't really based on orientation concerns. Thank you for the well wishes.
Many suicide helplines operate on a charitable/non-profit basis and are manned by volunteers who have chosen to be there, so it's really not their "job" at all and they are very sincere about what they are doing. What they aim to provide is a space where you can talk freely and openly to another human being without fear of judgement, criticism or hysteria. It's that freedom to talk, vent and cry (anonymously if you so wish) that helps to release the pressure that is so present in people who reach the point of crisis. It's worth pointing out that you don't have to be actively suicidal to call/contact many of these helplines. Even if you are having a bad day, with no immediate signs of crisis they will take your call and offer support, because they recognise the real value of talking sooner, rather than later. In the UK, the NHS signposts people with mental health problems to helpline services that have a good track record.
I have called helplines many times and in all honesty, it depends on who you get through to on the other end of the phone rather than the actual organisation themselves. It's basically a lottery.
Responding to the last two comments, I have to say the thought of contacting one of these hotlines still makes me wary. Even if one doesn't have to feel suicidal to call one, whether or not it'd actually help feels like too much of a gamble. Primary reason I asked about this yesterday evening was that my mood was wavering quite a bit, generally leaning toward hopelessness and feeling discarded. Honestly am not that much better today but enough where I'm hoping pursuing anti-depressants will help and calling one of these numbers won't be necessary. Though if I was in a bad place again, don't think I'd call one regardless.
I didn't mean to put you off calling them. If you feel suicidal you must reach out to someone. I just hoped to give you an honest opinion because in my experience, sometimes it helped a lot but other times, I didn't feel helped at all and so things felt just as bad when I came off the phone as they did before I decided to make the call and that in itself can leave you feeling hopeless, especially when it feels like the last resort. All I'm trying to say is, if you do decide to call a helpline and don't find it helpful, it isn't the end. Call another if you have to. You just need to find someone at the other end of the phone who you feel 'gets it' and can help you think about ways you can get through this difficult time. Generally, it's best to keep busy both mentally and physically to get through a crisis. Talking to someone who is understanding also really helps. It doesn't have to be a helpline. The EC community has helped me through many a crisis too.
I understood that, and I appreciated your honest opinion despite what my reaction suggests. Since making phone calls is nerve-wracking to begin with, that hotline people can vary so much in their ability to make one feel better or not only makes the anxiety worse. In general I always try to keep myself active, mentally at least, right now it feels like I'm simply too tired of trying to 'hold out' for better things, as though my spirit's just about given up. It doesn't feel like there is anyone I can truly turn to anymore which is also a big reason I'm feeling this way now. Experience only seems to tell me that I don't and am incapable of making a lasting impact on anyone else so it seems, 'Why bother anymore?'
Some helplines run e-mail/written word services. If you find it difficult to talk on the telephone, you may prefer to consider writing about how you feel.
Depression makes you feel like that, tired and wanting to give up. Remind me, are you on any medication or seeing a therapist?
Patrick: That I might consider when I'm feeling low again, still a bit concerned about the ability of a given volunteer to help though. :/ anonym: I've been in therapy the last couple years now, and gradually considering being screened for anti-depressant medication.
Are you able to share your thoughts and feelings about suicide with your therapist? As for anti-depressants, I know there are a lot of people who are against them but I don't think I'd be here if I hadn't gone down that route.
Yes, I've generally become more open about when experiencing suicidal ideation in therapy. Naturally I was reluctant at first, worrying that even mentioning it would be a red alert and get the infamous 48-hour hospitalisation. May I ask how your experience with anti-depressants have been?
I used Lifeline once which is a Northern Irish crisis helpline. I have to admit, the counsellor I spoke to was lousy at giving advice. In fact, she gave me links to websites that didn't even exist. But at a time when I felt like nobody wanted to hear about what I was going through, I needed someone to listen more than needing any specific counselling. And she was a very good listener. It was quite awkward but telling strangers your problems over the phone when you're emotional is always going to be awkward. They experience loads of these calls on a daily basis so don't worry about embarrassing yourself or anything like that. Like Patrick said, they are mostly volunteer run, and volunteers wouldn't be there unless they wanted to help. I think it's better to speak to someone on the phone rather than send an email, you get a real-time human response which allows for much better communication and connection than waiting around for someone to reply. I hope things improve for you. I remember being where you are - it does get better.
I tried 2 other anti depressants before the one I'm on now, both of which gave me unpleasant side effects and not much improvement in my mood. I've been on my current medication for about a year and a half now and have improved significantly. I don't notice any side effects other than an increased appetite and a little weight gain, which I could easily lose if I put my mind to it. Perhaps I feel a little flat as well, it's hard to tell since I'm not a very emotional person anyway. I wouldn't say my depression is cured. Medication doesn't really do that. It's kind of a temporary aid for a more long term problem, which buys you time and lifts your mood while you work at the bigger problems (most likely in therapy). Hope that helps.
I've been on both sides of the fence. I've used hotlines before, and I also volunteer for one. From my experience USING a hotline, I've talked to some who were kind of bad, but many who were good. I have anxiety, so I never called; I always used text based hotlines. Even when the volunteers I talked to haven't been very good, it can be nice to talk to someone anonymously and get things off your chest. I volunteer for a text based hotline, and I can tell you that I wouldn't be there if I didn't care. The people who answer the calls are doing it because they do care, so don't think they are being insincere. I would encourage you to use a hotline if you feel the need. They are no replacement for therapy or treatment, but they can be a great resource in a crisis.
