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A heart full of love and no outlet- help

Discussion in 'General Support and Advice' started by pointofnoreturn, Jun 12, 2015.

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  1. pointofnoreturn

    pointofnoreturn
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    I know that I've written about this before- sorry if this bores you.
    That being said, now that she's out of my life I've been doing my best to move on: got a job, about to graduate high school, college in two months, etc.
    But I'm still absolutely madly in love with her. She's got a pretty serious boyfriend, and she's happy, and I'm happy for her.
    My heart is so full of love for her that I don't know what to do with it. It's frustrating because I've got so much I want to express but I can't; she's gone and doesn't love me, and to the outside world we were only ever friends, so I can't show how I really feel. Obviously I love other people, but the love she inspires in me every day is a miraculous and beautiful thing, to the point where even my description here doesn't do it justice.
    I do want to be in a relationship at some point; my family, my mom in particular, keeps making comments about how cute certain guys are, how I should date men and other things like that.
    I've been thinking that in college I should try dating men...I've liked men before; it can't be that hard.
    Any advice on what to do with this outpouring of love would be greatly appreciated.
     
    #1 pointofnoreturn, Jun 12, 2015
  2. Michael

    Michael
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    Volunteering can help. If I didn't came home so tired, I would give it a try.

    There is tons of people out there who need a kind word, or gesture, or simply practical help.
    Think about the difference between volunteering and rushing to enter a relationship to get rid of your 'excess of love'. You won't be doing much in the second case, except feeding someone's little ego and probably buying one way ticket to emotional pain.

    There is no 'relationship', there is agreements with somebody in particular, for specific reasons, and try to crete such reasons so you just can say 'I'm in a relationship' won't have a happy end, unless you are willing to see it as a practical 'relationship'. Don't think that's what you want.

    Society puts a great pressure on women to be in relationships. Single men will be tolerated as long as their assets prove their worth. For women, it is still 'how good was the deal they made' (marriage or boyfriend).

    Your folks are pressuring you 'cause they were pressured at your age, so they think it's their turn now to pressure you.

    Do whatever makes you happy. Try to volunteer, to spend more time with friends, or give a push to your studies. Keep yourself busy. Don't try to rush things, this is not like buying a car. Annd if you go about it with the wrong mindset, you are bound to find yourself in awkward (and maybe dangerous) situations.
     
    #2 Michael, Jun 13, 2015
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