Making TRUE friends in your 20's.. Is it possible for me?!

deffo you can meet people, but alas making friends takes time.
i live in the middle of nowhere and left all my friends back in england alas they didnt bother with me when i went to see them so ive had to make new friends. the best advice i can give you is to just do things, like if you want to see that gig in a town like 30 mins from you but no one can go do it. youll meet people in line. if you want to go walk your dog in the nice park up the road then do it. basically just do things, even if youre uncomfortable at first youll become more used to the idea and in turn your energy will give off one of a 'hey come talk to me be my friend' sort of thing rather than maybe being 'omg what am i doing' sort of vibe. honestly thats the only advice i can give is to just do things and youll will eventually meet people if you put effort into it, i.e introducing yourself and not caring if you get rejected.

also online is a good place to meet people, but again it takes time.
just do you, the more you do you the better you will become at it ))))

 

Oh, it's definitely not too late. You're nineteen. You've still got a lot of your life ahead of you. I'm shy, and I've definitely made friends since turning 19.

I suppose it depends on what you do. If you were a uni student, it would be easy to meet people. If not, you have to make more effort to put yourself out there. Do you work, and if so, is your job something that puts you in contact with other people? That could be a start.

I don't know if I can give you advice on forming friendships. They develop when there's someone in particular that you could be friends with. I'm not saying friendship is easy; you do have to work at it sometimes. You have to take the initiative, and try not to go in with too high expectations. When there's someone you'd like to get to know better, be upfront about it and get either their number or their Facebook. Chat occasionally, suggest an activity together (preferably something you have a feeling they'd be into, whether that's listening to a certain band, or going shopping in a certain place) -- would they like to watch Jurassic World with you? Would they go with you to the mall, because you'd like a second opinion on a shirt? Or, since you'll be in a new city: Would they have the time to show you the best spot in the city?

So the main thing is to get out there and meet people. Not everyone you meet will become your best friend. But somewhere out there, there are plenty of people willing and worthy of being your friend.

Meetup groups are a good idea. Getting in touch with people who have at least one interest in common with you is a good start. And meetups usually have an activity planned (eg: playing board games), so there's no "What do we do now?" awkwardness.

If you're into a certain sport, it's a good idea to join a club related to it. If you like reading, join a library. (I actually met a really cool guy in the library this year). If you like animals, walking your dog will let you meet other animal-lovers. You can volunteer at a center somewhere, if you have any free time. You can start studying a new language, and join a club for enthusiasts of that language/attend meetings to practice that language.

Talk to your neighbors! Definitely introduce yourself to your new neighbors, and invite them for dinner/a drink sometime when you're settled in. Instant social circle boost. They may not end up being your best friends, but getting along with your neighbors is never a bad thing. Besides, they might have suggestions for social events you could go to.

Look into Couchsurfing. It's not for making friends, exactly, but it's great for meeting people. You don't even have to host strangers if you're not comfortable with that, but you can go to local Couchsurfing meetings and talk with plenty of awesome, open-minded people.

Once you have a friend or two (or even just good acquaintances), you'll meet their friends, and slowly expand your social circle. At some point, if you consistently put yourself out there, you'll strike gold.

Anyway -- good luck, and it really is not too late.

 

I have no clue what "SA" or "CORE" action are, but I do know that it is possible to make good friends even in your 30s.

About two years ago I started my old job. During breaks I would sit in the break room and there was a group of friends that always sat near me. I would slowly start adding to their conversation when I felt it was appropriate and before I realized it I was part of the group. This is where I met "A". We would just talk as part of the group and when the other were carrying on a conversation that we really weren't interested in we would talk to each other. There was no "initiating friendship" we just kinda started talking. Now two years later she is my best friend and we live together as roommates and work at the same place again too because we both managed to get fired for different reasons).

The truth is that making friends is as easy as being able to say hello.


BTW: This is a forum where people come and go at different times it may take a while but most of the time you will get a reply. All we ask for is a bit of patience.

 

Hi ChloeKiss,

I do not think it is ever too late to make true friends. I am just 35 years of age and for the past 15 or so years I had become more and more isolated. The "friends" I grew up with were never real friends and I was always the butt of their jokes. This along with my self hatred and being in the closet, caused me to literally lock myself away all these years. It is only really now that I am even starting to try to make friendships with people more like me (only on here so far). I know that it is going to be difficult ( I am painfully shy and really self conscious) but I know that it will happen (even a fleeting look at other EC members' experiences support this). I think that your plan to go to meet up groups is an excellent idea. Meeting like minded people, even if they don't become true friends, would be a great start and will probably give you the confidence boost you need. Once you take the plunge and get yourself out there, regardless of how difficult you will inevitably meet people who you will click with, just keep true to yourself and keep battling away, and remember you are only turning 20 so there is plenty of time.

I hope this helps a bit.

 

i'll be your friend sorry if that sound creepy

 

I'm sure you can make more friends whether it's where you live now or in a different town..but it will take a lot of work! I'm 22 and I have maybe 2 friends who would be there for me no matter what! I suck at making friends so I understand...and it doesn't help that I work at home so I don't really have an opportunity to meet people at work or anything like that..and like you said most people already have their friend groups. I wish you luck and hopefully you can be yourself and make some friends ..I know what you're going through because I'm trying the same thing

 

I don't have to say much here, pretty much all good points here are covered. Someone once said to me: "The best time to make friends is during high school". I call total BS on that! More often than not friends from high school grow apart and have different priorities in life. As you mature, you will attract like-minded people and that's a lot more rewarding. So it's never too late
You will probably meet bitches in your way. I hope you will meet the right type of bitch

 

Absolutely, possible . I think it happens when you aren't looking for one though.My best friend is a 20 yr old straight Russian guy. We can't be more opposite. I didn't even like him at first but he'd come to the cafe I work at all the time and it just dawned on me one day that this was an amazing person. A true friend is just the best thing in the world.When you find one ,and you will,cherish that relationship.

 

You can totally make more friends Chloe. Just find some people who you are comfortable with and then talk to them get to know them and yea. If you just slowly start coming out of your shell I'm sure you'll make plenty more friends.

 

I've made almost 90% of my friends after I turned 20 (I realize I'm only 22, but point still proven!). I even met my best friend only a year ago when I was 21, and it was completely random. I used to be so crazily shy but within the last 4 years (mostly at university) my personality has done a complete 180, probably because I discovered who I was and came to terms with myself and now I'm 100% comfortable in my own skin. When I came to university I knew nobody - and I had some but very few friends until a few years later. I joined some organizations and put myself out there and I've made some incredible friends.

Something to think about is you're going to get out of something what you put in, you're going to have to step forward because hanging back and waiting people to come to you isn't the best strategy! Joining groups of like-minded people will definitely help, you'll have something to talk about to initiate conversations and you'll be more comfortable around them. The fact that you're joining a beauty course and moving outside of your hometown is actually a really great place to make new friends and start over. It's an opportunity to start a clean slate and get to know people from the very beginning!

 

Absolutely! I'm 28 and still enjoy making friends!