I'm bi. I recently came out to all my friends (within the year) and have finally accepted myself and my sexuality. I'm happier than I've ever been. Soon after coming out I met a great guy who I've been with for 6 months. I'm absolutely in love with him...except I find myself wondering all too often if I just don't know what I'm missing. I know I'm bi, no doubt in my mind anymore, but I've never had sex with or had a relationship with a woman. Sometimes I worry that I'll be miserable 5 or even 10 years down the road when I realize I never truly explored that entire side of myself. Wondering if anyone else has ever felt the same way. P.S I have no friends who are openly Bi and I desperately need someone to talk to about this who can relate. (&&&)
I don't have any advice but I wanted to say that I am going through a similar situation. I am currently in a relationship with a guy as well. I /have/ been with a girl but only once so I know there is a lot more I haven't experienced.
I'm in the same boat too. I've never dated a woman, and am in my first ltr with a guy. I wonder all the time what I am missing out on. The way I see it though, is no matter who you are in a relationship with, you would have different experiences (both romantic and sexual) with a different person. A straight woman in my position, being in my first relationship, could feel like she was missing out on being with other guys. So it's kind of the same. I do understand (and can relate to) the feeling of wondering what you could have experienced with a woman, but in my opinion you can get these feeling when you're straight or gay as well as bi/pan. That's part of what being in a relationship is about: giving up those other experiences for a deeper more meaningful one with a single individual.
When I was first coming out, calling myself gay, and got my first girlfriend I always wondered if I wouldn't rather be with a guy but just never gave myself that chance (I guess this was also a little bit of internalized homophobia). Anyways long story short I cheated on my girlfriend and realized that I didn't want a relationship with a guy but I wanted the idea that I could be with a guy so I wouldn't have to be queer. I have never questioned if I would rather be with a guy again because I don't have to. After my experience I realized how wonderful and perfect my girlfriend is and that I wouldn't give her up for anything. You being bi maybe a different story, I mean some people are polyamorous and can love and devote themselves to multiple people. Could it be maybe calling it a straight relationship makes you feel stripped of your queerness? Perhaps maybe seeing yourself as bi in every aspect of your life, even your your relationship with a man, would satisfy your desire to express your queerness. (just a thought)
You mentioned your friends, but does your boyfriend know about your orientation? Does he know about this internal conflict?
Hello "R999", Before I came out as a lesbian I told my friends that I was bisexual, only because I wasn't too comfortable with the label. When I dated guys there was always this feeling that I knew for a fact there was much more than this. This (straight relationship) couldn't be love, marriage, commitment. I decided to experience a relationship and sexual activities with a women and it literally changed everything. Since then I could no longer doubt that I will always be much happier with a female, guys are great but that full extension of happiness doesn't meet with men (for me of course). Now I am not saying that you should find a female and have sex with her, be honest with your mate. If you think you can be happier, then you can be happier. When you finally find that person whether it's male or female you'll know and won't have to worry about 5-10 years later. This is just my opinion.
I'm also sort of in the same boat, but opposite. So like the boat right next to it. I've always been in a ltr with guys. I've had two - but always felt like something was missing/off. After my last one I decided to just focus on school and my career, so I wasn't with a guy for 4 years. And then I met this girl... it changed everything for me. I never got to be with her, besides being sort of cuddly, but I felt like everything clicked with her. I was mind blown. Never thought I would/could be with a woman, but as I started accepting my feelings (a long process that I'm still in) something about it felt natural. So what I'd say to you is: you should probably look into these feelings. You're still young, there's no rush to settle down right now. To me, I'd question how much I really liked this person if I was questioning what else possibly better is out there. Though it is normal to wonder about other people and circumstances to a point, I don't know...I feel like if someone were completely happy, they wouldn't really be questioning their relationship or the potential for something better. They'd just be hahappy in what they were in. Just my opinion...
I am on the same boat too. And clueless what to do but i think woth should totally go for it so you can have you fair share. I am still thinking how to come out on my bf no clue lol
