So, I've got a dude friend right now who I like very much and bla bla bla... The only thing is that it's bringing up some gender confusion(?) crap that just really annoys me. Not just at myself or him, but at society in general and... Gah. It's just so easy to slip into that silly girlie funk when I'm talking to him. Which, is fine, I mean, I like him a hellova lot so who even cares, but... I still feel like a guy so much of the normal time, and I feel like I can't fully share that with him. He's straight as an arrow, and I think my gender non-conformity squiggs him out to a certain extent (he's really not into my short hair, wearing boys' clothes, etc. and is very open about his turned-offedness when it comes to that). It's hard to be in a solid relationship with soneone who's never questioned themselves before. Like, I've been seriously considering asking people to call me by male pronouns (maybe like half the time or something, idk) for the past few months, but I know that would probably be a deal-breaker for him... - don't get me wrong- this guy isn't an ass or a homophobe or anything- he's just a nice nornal guy, who's super cinsiderate and cool but still trying to understand where I'm coming from. I guess that basically my main question here is, how do I be a man about something that automatically puts me into the typical girlie role? Lol did that make sense? ;D ... Anyway, any advise you can give me on how to stop emasculating myself would be awesome (I know that sounds weird, and I'm trying not to care. HA.)
Well...if you're really serious about it. Put on the prettiest make-up you can, wear girly clothes, laugh at everything he says, even if it's stupid (totally pick that up from Avatar) Then you talk his ears off, curse like a sailor, discuss about manly stuffs, sit with the legs wide apart. Cognitive dissonance at its finest. This will confuse the hell out of him. If he's the type of guy I think he is, he will probably think of you as one of the dudes. But, I can't predict the future. On the other hand, he may find you 'outstanding', different from other girls, and that might draw him in romantically. But the most important question is: "Is this guy good enough for me? Will he ever accept me?" If you find yourself changing too much to suit his taste. It's a time to step back and reevaluate the situation. Anyway, as long as there's a possibility, go for it!
