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How to deal with bottled up emotions

Discussion in 'General Support and Advice' started by lonewolfblair, Jul 14, 2015.

  1. lonewolfblair

    Regular Member

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    Location:
    Victoria
    Gender:
    Female (trans*)
    Sexual Orientation:
    Lesbian
    Well where to begin well i guess with what is being bottled up: anything negative.

    I don't feel sadness i go straight to numb. My temper is twisted as i can hold it in forever but if a tigger comes along my anger explodes and so far outbursts are becoming harder to contain and when i do get angry it doesn't solve anything in fact feeling sadness doesn't fix anything anger doesn't fix anything in fact the only thing that helps is being the good little girl the chooses others over her self yet my bottled emotions cause me to slip into the background as i have a growing contempt for those who i once called friends.

    If my best friend were to abandon me i would fall into the deep and become isolated violent and incredibly self destructive.

    But it seems i can't avoid that fate as i have bottled myself up for far too long and now face a one way ticket to this fate.

    Is there anything i can do to fix this?
     
  2. Azrael

    Regular Member

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    I think we just have to accept that at times you just don't fit in with your friends. Try to find yourself a movie or a series, something to watch. I sometimes find characters that I can relate too or look up to and I model myself after them. Find something that inspires you.
     
  3. Feline

    Feline Guest

    It's not healthy to swallow your emotions, as you have experienced already, they only pile up until they explode and you hurt those around you, or they implode and you self-destruct. You need to let them flow, be felt, and let them go, for your own well-being and those around you.

    Feelings, emotions, they are part of (y)our existence and they do have a function. Often they are the first internal response we have to any given situation, you can view them as signals of what the situation means to you, how it affects you, how you perceive your surroundings, how you want to react. So, feeling them is useful in that sense.

    My suggestion is, first, allow yourself to feel, allow your senses to develop, give yourself the chance to realize what is that stirring you're feeling inside, whether it is sadness, anger, happiness, fear, surprise, etc.

    Then, obtain from them the motivation to act, to move, to do, so you can process them, learn from them, and let them go. I'd suggest expressing them, either by talking or writing to someone, or even keeping a diary/journal; if you don't feel like expressing them that way, try something creative. Write a story, draw or paint something, sing, dance, listen to music, etc. This is especially important now that you're growing and developing your identity, it can help you know yourself better, make life better.

    Paralyzing your internal self doesn't make you a 'good girl'. And while choosing others over yourself might be good, it depends why (your purpose) and how you do it; it is more damaging at the end (for you and for those around you) if you abandon yourself entirely. Care for yourself the way you'd care for others.

    Hope you find my words helpful. Good Luck!