Hi, I'm new here. I was just hoping if there is anyone here to just give some advice on friendships. Well more of how to cope with not having many friends. Lately I've just been feeling down and sad because I've come to realization that all my friends have moved on, everyone has left and they all have new lives and new everything. It's been hard for me to make new friends because when school is over chances of making new friends slowly dissapears, I've tried joining apps and sites but it has all been useless and people just want hook ups or a boyfriend. Sometimes when I mention I already have a boyfriend they just dissapear. I don't want to seem like I'm super depressed but it's just hard for me not being able to have people to talk to or share dumb stories with and that sort of thing. I have a boyfriend (he lives a little far but we visit), and it's great but sometimes I don't know I want more friends who share the same interests and are geeks like me and that sort of thing. Sometimes it doesn't feel like I can't do anything and I'll just keep getting rejected for some reason or another. The friends I've made in the past few months stopped trying to keep contact with me and wont respond to me, everything seemed great and fine but it just stopped. I wasn't too sure about posting this, I just kind of want advice... I just want things to be better if that'snot too much to ask.
I understand how you feel. I'm very shy and self conscious so I have a hard time making new friends. It sucks to feel lonely. I would say if you're feeling lonely you should try to focus on what makes you happy in life. Focus your time on your hobbies or maybe learn a new hobby. Take a class at the community center or something to learn to do something you have always been interested in or volunteer in the community. You are bound to meet people doing this who you can make friends with.
building friendships after school is really hard. people get into their cliques sometimes and do not want to let others in. also sometimes if you're in a big city with a lot of young people, you meet so many people each day, it's hard to keep up with people. another thing is when it comes to gay guys that are single, usually people want you for something. if you are not going to hookup with them or be their boyfriend, then they may not want you around. i find that with gay guys once they have their "friend pack" its almost like a clique and the rarely let anyone new in. sure, you can get in if you are dating one of the guys, but to just join in, that's not very easy. pretty much same with straight guys too. the best advice is to join something with purpose. volunteer somewhere where you can see the same people each week. that way you have a reason to see them each week and it's easier to discover new friends that way. try some meetup groups too. good luck. keep your head up. it's hard to make new friends but it's nothing you're doing. so do not feel like it your fault.
Finding friends is a chance thing so don't read too much into periods of loneliness. Make your life adventurous. The world is full of interesting things so find one that interests you and explore it in depth. As you become proficient, reach out to others with similar interests. That will greatly expand your knowledge and understanding. It's a lot of fun and you won't have time to be lonely.
