Recently I have lost motivation towards few stuff. All I do at home is just watch videos and tv shows and I have no idea what to do with my life. I have also been struggling with my relationship with the guy I have a crush on (who's gay) and I feel like my life is going no where. The reason why is because there is no school going on and I'm just here wasting time and getting criticized by family, especially my dad:dry:. I really want to move but I don't have a job, yet, and I don't know where to go. My brothers are just b*tches and my dad is a dumb*ss. I just wanted to get this out.
I've been there, too. I think sometimes the only thing that can salvage a slow summer is finding pet projects so you don't feel like you're stagnating. Netflix is great until it's just numbing dissatisfaction. I have to talk to people a lot about this in my own life because I'm impatient... but a small step is still a step. If the only direction you can find for awhile is to write a novel or go for a morning jog every day well, that's moving.
Depression is rough. Be kind to yourself. It is tough finding work, but it will probably help you feel much better when you do. Have you considered doing something part time and unpaid, like an internship, to build connections? Or, taking up a new hobby to get you out there, doing something to build yourself up?
Doesn't sound like depression to me, unless you are being stoic in your post, but I agree, taking some kind of action is the cure. Here is what i want you to do. Call your local food bank and tell them you want to volunteer as a gleaner. You can learn to be a gleaner in about an hour. It is incredibly fun and very helpful to the poor. There is no commitment needed, you can volunteer for one Saturday afternoon and be done and never have to do it again. The reason I suggest this is to see how you feel afterward. The expreience may help you find a path forward.
