drugs

Rehab.

 

+1

You acknowledged there's a problem, so the next step is to get help. Not only for your addiction but also for your depression. Good luck! (*hug*)

 

Agreed. Stuff like this is hard to do alone. And frankly, you shouldn't have to do it alone. Every little bit of support helps.

 

Please get help. You need rehab with professional help to fight this addiction.

 

I've been down this path, since you've already established that you have a problem and why, the only real step you need to take now is to get professional help and until that time, I suggest you think "What is it about painkillers that makes me feel better?" but also to think about things to replace it with.

Take up a sport to get the endorphins running, it has the same effect as morphine.
Read a book.
Draw.
Take up knitting.
Gardening.

There are so many things you can try to distract you while you wait to consider the pros and cons of help. I'm also here if you need to talk.

 

Unless your parents are violent or otherwise abusive people, you can safely ask them for help with this. If it's too scary to ask face-to-face, you can try writing a note, either on paper or electronically. Or ask someone else (a friend, an older sibling, an aunt or uncle, a teacher, a priest, whoever you might trust and feel comfortable with) to help you talk to your parents. (This last option can be really helpful if you're afraid your parents will panic and over-react - parents tend to have much more controlled freak-outs when there's another adult watching them, especially someone who's not family.)

Whether or not you manage to ask for help directly, though, there are two things you can do:

1. Tell your parents want to see a counselor. (If you can't even say this much to your parents, you can try finding one through your school.) It may be possible that you're self-medicating for some level of pre-existing depression, or it may be that your depressed feelings are withdrawal induced. Either way, a mental health professional can help you find safer and more legal ways of dealing with them. And of course, if you want to confess to your parents but are afraid to do it at home, a professional's office can provide a safe, neutral space to have that conversation.
2. Ask your parents to lock up their medication. Tell them you're worried about your friends coming over and getting into them. Tell them you're worried about your little brothers and sisters, if you have any. You could even tell them you're curious because you've heard people take this stuff recreationally, and you don't want to be tempted.

I've known a lot of people with terrible, long-term addictions to this stuff, and it can really spiral out of control quickly. You want to deal with it BEFORE it gets any worse, I promise.

Good luck, and take care of yourself!

 

I don't want to scare you from that idea because its great to talk to a school counselor and I definitely think you'd find it worth while. Just keep in mind to mention to them that you might not want to get your parents involved just yet. I don't know about the laws where you live but in NZ our school counselors are required to alert parents if we're a danger to ourselves or the people around us. Probably doesn't taking drugs but just be wary.

 

The "danger to yourself or others" rule is a pretty standard one in a lot of places, but you can definitely ask your school counselor to explain exactly what their confidentiality rules are and how they apply in different cases. (The other situation in which a counselor is likely be legally required to break confidentiality is if they believe you're being seriously abused or endangered by someone else.)

Talking to a counselor about your struggles with depression and other stresses may help you figure out healthier strategies for dealing with them, though, even if you're not comfortable mentioning the drugs.

Do try to get your parents to lock them up, though!

 

I am a recovering drug addict. The fact that you know it's a problem is the biggest step to recovery I feel. It took me a couple years of getting high to acknowledge I had a problem. I quit doing heroin and you can stop pills it's going to be hard especially with them being so accessible but it's something worth fighting for. With me I found it helpful to picture all the reasons I wanted to stop. If depression makes you want to do them then your probably going to have to get a therapist to help you recover. If you don't want to talk to your parents talk to the school guidance office and see if they can recommend that you go see a therapist to your parents. As others have said when you feel the urge to use do something else to distract yourself it does do wonders to journal to help discover your triggers as well.What I'm about to say may seem like I'm making light about your situation I promise that's not at all how I mean it. Pills are hard to kick but other drugs are so much harder to get off of the withdrawal from heroin will make you feel like your going to die please get help before your addiction evolves to a street drug. Once your clean the urges will get better but it won't go away completely you'll have to be careful around anything that's habit forming as recovering addicts are more likely become addicted to another substance. I'm not saying that when you're of age that you can't ever have a beer just to be mindful of your intake. I can go to the bar and have a beer but I know I can't drink a lot or I risk abusing it. Your experience will not be the same as mine no two recovery stories are the same. Just know it does get better and please get help.