Agnostic?

Live your life to the fullest. Be kind, generous, and loving. If you strive to be a good person your whole life I'm sure you'll be set. In the bible shrimp is mentioned as an abomination 4 times more than homosexuality. It's just ridiculous really. There is no reason for which an all powerful and all knowing being would care whether you're attracted tovthe same sex or not. If such a being did exist then it stands to reason that I'm would tell you itself. So don't sweat it.

Sincerely,
Your friendly neighborhood atheist

 

Maybe...Christianity is just not for you? I'm also Catholic-ish, so I think I get what you're going through kinda. It sorta makes sense once you start going through Confirmation. But for me, about a year later, it kinda...idk, like it sloughed off?
For your Heaven and Hell dilemma, think about this. Is the corrupt churchgoer any better than the do-good atheist? If you've seen Disney's "The Hunchback of Notre Dame" , then think about that. Esmerelda and Quasimodo are obviously good, even though they're gypsies. Judge Frollo is obviously evil, even though he's a devout Catholic. Who will go to hell? If there is a God, and I'm not saying there isn't, then pretty sure ze (and I do mean "ze") will judge you on your actions, not how often you went to church.
I feel that there's something out there, yes. Are there nights when I think, "oh, God's out there", and "oh, there's A god out there"? Yes. And to an atheist (no offense Lady Diana, you're awesome!), that just sounds completely odd. Logically, it makes no sense to believe in a god, much less God.
Buuuut...try maybe looking into different religions? Recently I was looking into the nature-spirit/elders of the Hawaiian culture (aumakua), and if it wasn't for the fact I'm not indigenous Hawaii'an, I felt that it might have clicked. So maybe I'm slightly pagan-ish since I believe in nature spirits or treating the earth well? Maybe you're pagan-ish too. Or maybe you might look into Buddhism, Taoism, less-extreme Islam (I apologize for offending any Muslims out there), or other non-Judaic religions. Many indigenous cultures before European colonialism, had religions that, guess what? They preached acceptance. The Native American cultures had the "two-spirit" 's, spiritual leaders who, superficially, remind me of transgender people. Pacific Islander cultures usually had a third gender, which included the spectrum, usually not straight. Look up random aboriginal cultures and their original views on non-hetero peoples, before Judaic colonialism changed everything.
Hmm...anyways, back to you, have you tried meditating? Not the whole lotus-position, clear your mind, Occlumency kinda stuff, but just, breathing? My spirituality, which is kind of religion-y-ish, has a lot to do with just sitting back, and breathing. Maybe just talking it out in my head without feeling judgement.

---------- Post added 3rd Sep 2015 at 12:50 AM ----------

Sorry for the long post. I hope it helps? If you want more advice on meditating, just write on my wall. It's too convoluted for me to explain in one giant wall of text, but it might make sense in smaller wall posts, as odd as that sounds.

 

Hello. Well, I am not a strong Christian believer, or very religious at all for that matter. I go to church and I believe in god, but I don't believe that god would be dissapointed in the Qcommunity. For one thing, god loves all his children. We are still his children, therefore, he loves us too. For another thing, God doesn't make many mistakes. Or, if he does make mistakes, I think he finds a way to smooth them over. God meant for every human being to be born, and we are all here for a reason. He doesn't make things easy for us, that's for sure... but he doesn't make mistakes either. Thirdly, (and forgive me if this goes against religion) God didn't actually take up a pen and paper and write the bible himself. According to belief, he may have influence those who did write the bible, but He himself did not. Fourthly, the genesis chapter in the bible was the latest written, meaning that the people who did write it were already influenced by many people before them, who were probably straight. And, because god doesn't make mistakes, it made sense that these people are "normal" and this is the way things are supposed to be. Again, I'm sorry if this clashes with your religion at all.


(Hm, I probably should have used "Ze".)

---------- Post added 3rd Sep 2015 at 03:14 PM ----------

On another note, not all Christians are anti gay. My friend and his family are very strong Christian believers, but they are perfectly accepting; in fact, my friend himself just transitioned, and his family has been very accepting.

 

Sounds exactly like my family! If you truly still believe there is a God (regardless of your thoughts on Religion), then you're not necessarily agnostic. You may just be looking for the right church community that will fit the type of worship and study that you need, or you may just be going through a rough patch in your faith.

I've spent the last 4 years looking for a church that was authentic, and in Jan I finally found one. So many communities of faith (in every religion) are too concerned with their image or attendance or building that they lose their initial calling and fall into a boring routine. I don't find myself wanting to be a part of a church like that, and end up seeking a church that is showing the fruits of the spirit: Love, Joy, Peace, Patience, Kindness, Goodness, Faith, Gentleness, and Self Control. The worship, sermon, donuts, decorations, and everything else don't even factor into my decision on if I go to that church or not.

I've found that churches that show those particular traits also are the ones that are more welcoming to all people regardless of their orientation or past sins. By happy coincidence, when I came out to my new pastor a few weeks ago he just said, "Well, I know you're not going to hell."

Not all churches are equal! And not all Christians are conservative! Don't ever feel like you'll be going to hell because you've not gone to services for a while, or because of your sexual orientation!

If you want to talk more theology, or anything church-y let me know!