Hi all, I dont really know where to start or what im hoping to get out of this (probably i just need to get my feelings out somewhere even if its just on the internet) I am 24 and for a veeery young age i have known that i was mainly attracted to girls. The "problem" came on my teen years where i also fancied guys and occasionally kissed with them (i have never kissed a girl). Since I was 19 i have been very VERY confused and afraid, coming out has never been an option but, unlike many people in the closet, i never pretended to be straight. I just stopped dating at all and i somewhat became romatically invisible. I believe my close enviroment, or even people that have known me for a while, know that i am not interested in guys, but since i never make any comments at all they just let it go. In addition i tend to shut people down when they get too close (ie, friends family) by the fear that they will start asking uncorfortable questions. The biggest challenge is that i am ALWAYS attracted to straight girls and, because i am considered "pretty" i get my hopes up when i meet girls and make up all these signs in my mind only to have my heart broken by the casual "...oh the other day with my bf..." while i put on a casual smile. all in all i feel im in a vicious circle i cant really get out of: i know that if i find a girl i really like i wont have a problem letting people know but the problem is i have only been attracted to straight woman all my life and im too scaredd to put myself out there. + for some reason or another straight people after a while think im gay whilst gay people assume im straight which leaves me in a very lonely limbo. thanks for reading and sorry for the long post + english mistakes?
