Hi guys, I just wanted some advice on what to do in this situation. My sibling recently hit me and so I shouted at them and raised my hand as if to hit them back, but stopped before anything happened. Since then, they've told me that I'm nasty and worthless as a person and haven't spoken to me at all. I tried clearing the air and said that I just shouted because I was scared of what they might do and was defending myself, but they just coldly said "I told you to never speak to me again" and walked off. I can't tell my family because that will only make things worse. In the past when this has happened and I told my family, I ended up feeling like I was the one in the wrong and that I had made it all up. I can't tell my friends because I haven't got any that I trust to be honest. I'm just feeling incredibly alone and like I'm slowly going crazy. Am I at fault? I just feel so sick and anxious about this whole situation. How do you cope with a loved one becoming so cold and hostile? It's like they don't even know me any more and honestly I can't cope with it. Any help will be appreciated. I feel like I'm suffocating under all this and don't know what to do
That's terrible that they hit you! Do you parents allow that? I hope not but I can see how "tattling" could be misconstrued. Crazy suggestion: Are there any karate or other martial arts classes around you could take? A class for girls would be good, if there is one. I think it would serve two purposes. One. Show your siblings they better watch out if they want to mess with you again. And two. You'd get a breather from your family and meet new people you'd have something cool in common with. And it will build your confidence. I think if you felt better about yourself a little, you'd feel stronger about standing up for yourself within your family. I'm sure if your parents knew how miserable you were, they'd want to help you but if you don't feel you can tell them, things can't change. Whatever you decide, do something nice for yourself.
When I was your age my brother hit me and put me down all the time. When I would go to my parents they would just make excuses for him and they never did stop it. For whatever reason they just didn't understand how much he was hurting me. I get what you're going through. You're 17, is your sibling a teenager as well? It's hard being a young adult. The fact that your sibling is treating you badly is a sign that he/she is going though something difficult and most likely it has nothing to do with you. It sucks, it really does, but it isn't your fault. What helped me during this time was seeing a counselor at my school. Most schools have one or more counselors on staff that students can just drop in on and see. Your parents aren't supportive so you need to find someone who is. I want to mention, my brother and I get along great now. It took until we were in our late 20's but we're friends now. So don't believe this will last forever. It could be just a phase and your relationship may improve in the future.
