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Existential Crisis

Discussion in 'General Support and Advice' started by Dapat, Nov 29, 2015.

  1. Dapat

    Dapat Guest

    Okay so I don't really know how to explain this but i'll try my best.

    Last night, I was browsing the net and I came across a piece of text about the idea of oblivion. Simplified it described our death as losing our existence as we are no longer conscious, etc.

    After I read that, I have had this horrible feeling. As someone who doesn't believe in any faith and follows science more-so, It broke me to realise that I also lack belief in any afterlife. I kept telling myself things like "If there's nothing at the end of my life, then nothing matters" and questioning whether I actually matter.

    This kept getting worse over the night to the point where I physically felt sick. I felt nauseous and scared.

    I saw my mother and explained how I felt, she said it's like that for everyone. But I find it difficult as even when i'm happy this feeling is CONSTANTLY there also, weighing me down.

    This has also happened again a few weeks ago, but my friends joked about a bit with it and I felt fine shortly after. But this... this time feels different. I just feel sort of empty inside.

    I'm not really sure if this is an actual existential crisis, but it's the best thing to call it I think. I don't really know what I can do to feel better. Has anyone else felt this way? What did you do about it?

    Any advice would be much appreciated. Thanks.
     
  2. The Escapist

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    I struggle with this fact too, that death is just like turning the lights out and then everything's gone. I'm an ex-Christian so I come from that point of view, I'm still coming to terms with reality after believing something else for most of my life.
    At first I was always in the back of my mind scared of dying because I hadn't shook the fear of Hell. By some miracle that eventually eroded, but now I am even more distrought because there is no afterlife at all. And nothing sounds worse to me than not existing at all, and having no more future or hope.
    But the dread has worn down a bit, so maybe we just get used to it. I'm a very thoughtful person, always lost in my head somewhere, so that could be why I obsess over this subject.

    So with the no afterlife problem, as someone who is personally ex-Christian (now non-religious), I see it as even though there is no Heaven.. that also means there is no Hell of eternal suffering. Seems like a fair enough trade for most people.
    But like I said, after getting through that stage, I got uncomfortable with there being no afterlife at all. But I would rather have the truth than an emotionally comforting lie, and it is what it is. But reality also includes our existence in this world. It's pretty "magical" to think of how lucky we are to be one of the few living beings who get to experience life. Think of how many people COULD be, but those potentials will forever stay in the realm of just not existing. But we get to. We get to experience happiness and adventure and friendship. We get to create goodness and future possibilities that we may not have for the humans who arrive here in the future. We get to live.
    After the party is over, and the lights have to turn off... it's not like we're going to be able to emotionally despair over our non-existence and mourn the absense of being somewhere. Like in sleep, we won't even think about it. It will just be.
    But we also were real, we existed. We had the chance to feel. :slight_smile:

    I'm sorry if none of those thoughts of mine made any sense, I just think about this alot and it probably came out as a horrible mess of words. But I hope you feel better soon, you are worth living. (*hug*)
     
  3. Dapat

    Dapat Guest

    That's actually really helpful. It may not have fixed the problem, but it doesn't seem AS bad. Awesome to see i'm not alone. Thank you!

    It seems a lot better if you switch out the word 'nonexistence' with 'permanent sleep'.
     
  4. Invidia

    Invidia Guest

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    Hi. I hate to hear you are feeling so bad about this. But we're here to listen. <3 I'd like to say a few things, I hope it will help.

    Firstly. I view death very differently than most people. Death, according to me, does not exist. It is impossible to die. Why? Because "you" are so much more than your bodily functions and your perception. Just because you will no longer be able to breathe, and likely not be able to gain further knowledge, and your memory will be erased, doesn't mean you will cease to exist. Why? Because of your actions - your actions have consequences, which in turn have consequences, which in turn have consequences and so on and so forth. You are an immortal ripple on an infinite ocean.

    Pondering existential questions is human nature. And it's all well and good... sometimes. Sometimes it can get too much though. Like now for you. When you're lying on your deathbed, what will you want to have achieved? I assume "obsessing over death" isn't one of the things on the list? Isn't it better to try to forget about it and live your life as fully as you can?

    Me myself, I'm very indifferent toward death. That might have to do with that I more or less have a death wish, but... I don't think about it very much. I don't know what will happen. And I don't trust religion or science or anything else to tell me what's going to happen. I'll know when it does (although I possibly won't be able to have time to reflect on it).

    I'm not interested in death, because I don't believe in it. I'm interested in life, in what I can do to help people, animals and nature, and how I can live a life full of love and joy.
     
    #4 Invidia, Nov 29, 2015
    Last edited: Nov 29, 2015
  5. CameOutSwinging

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    I used to struggle with this a lot when I was younger. I'd literally sit up at night unable to sleep because I was thinking about death and how there's no way of knowing what happens next, if anything. One day I just kind of stopped worrying about it. I don't even know when. I just noticed that it's not something I really think about anymore.
     
  6. PatrickUK

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    I don't know if it will help you, but there is a book of essays written by Swiss-American Psychiatrist, Elisabeth Kubler-Ross, entitled On Life After Death that you may wish to read. It's quite interesting and only 85 pages.

    Kubler-Ross spent many years studying near-death experiences and wrote extensively about the subject and the many conversations she had had with people. She also came up with the five stages of grief that we often quote on this forum to help people who are struggling to come out.

    If you are really struggling with all of these thoughts, it might (just might) help you.