So my brother's birthday was coming around and for weeks he has been bugging me about getting him this game called star wars battlefront, but I was hesitant to get it for him because when I move for college next year I would be taking my ps4 with me and then he would have nothing to play it on. So I decided to go above and beyond for him because I love him and wanted to get him something nice for his birthday. I was scouring for discounts, sales, and planned to split with my dad in half. Despite this it cost around $140 for me plus wrapping paper stuff. It was about $40 more than I would normally spend on a family gift, but I just wanted to get him something nice for his birthday. So I went through all this effort after going to multiple stores for the deal and finally got it for him. He put on a happy face for the dinner, but when we got home he asked me if he could return it and get the money from it. It honestly felt like a dick punch to me. He was whining about getting a certain game for a long time. I put thought into it knowing that if I get the game for him eventually he wouldn't be able to play it and then he tells me after all I went through to get it for him that he wants the money. Now I'm sitting hear with bloodshot eyes from crying and being upset about the situation. Do you think I'm overreacting? Do you think he is ungrateful? What would you do about the situation? Honestly don't know. I was thinking maybe just give him like $90 or just forcing him to keep it. I don't really know yet and would like some other opinions. Either way I probably will be giving him the cold shoulder for a while
I fell your anger is valid. You went through the trouble of getting something that he really wanted just for him to shove it back in your face. I would just let him keep the game, since he kept asking for it. Its his fault that he didn't ask for the money up front.
Hmmm. I would tell him exactly what you went through for him, and then say something like this: "NO I'm NOT returning it so that you can have the money! This was a huge sacrifice for me to do this for you and you are being ungrateful. Grow the f@ck up! It's not all about you!" But that's just me and I'm coming from this in a different perspective in that I'm a father (and grandfather for that matter) with more than just a little bit of life experience. As a side note: Good for you, big brother for going the extra mile for your bro! You seem like a nice guy.
He is 2 years older than me at 21... I know right ridiculous. I decided to heed my mom's advice and return it. I gave the half my dad spent to him, and kept the other half. I gave him $20 money gift that I would give to friends and subtracted the cost of the gift bag, tissue paper, and card. Making it $14.14. The reason he is probably being money grubbing right now is because he was stupid and spent $600 on credit for a keyboard he couldn't afford for himself during the holidays. Now he scrambling for money for presents. Gee? I wonder why?
On one hand, a gift is a gift and shouldn't be conditional. On the other, I do understand that it feels like a slap in the face. He should know you busted yourself getting him a really nice gift and should be thankful, rather than wanting the less personal stack of cash. $600 for a keyboard? That thing better sprout wings and fly him from one gig to the next. X.X You are totally right to feel insulted.
Honestly, I wouldn't invest that much time and energy worrying about it. Asking to return a gift like that is tacky and insensitive and he sounds a bit immature, and I might tell him so, but I'd just put the incident in my pocket of experience and not go out of my way when purchasing gifts for him in the future.
You should be the one to return it, then you can keep most of the money and give him a smaller amount for being so ungrateful.
Sounds right to me! You seem very close to him, but please don't be blind to his faults, as your story implies he can be rather self-centered.
