So I've been home for a week or so from college and I'm already bored out of my mind. I don't know what to do with myself and I think I'm starting to lapse into depression again. Most of the time I'm aimlessly reading news on the internet or watching TV or just sleeping because I don't think there's anything better to do. I don't even like this very much, I just feel lonely. Whenever I'm alone for a while I start to feel sad about myself and how much better I could have done and how impossible doing meaningful things is anyway. Everything just feels like a pointless effort. Break doesn't feel so relaxing for me and I just don't care about the holidays much anymore.
Cheer up. You are a college freshman who is reasonably out. You're ahead of me at that age I was so deeply in the closet and denial it wasn't funny. Can you say more about the bolded text? Maybe you are too hard on yourself?
I know I probably can't be much help on the depression part, but I can definitely relate to the boring feeling that comes with being home over winter break from college. It also doesn't help that I haven't been able to see my boyfriend during this entire time as well. Have you tried finding things of interest around your hometown you would be interested in going to to help keep your mind busy? I know for me family dinners help me do that, as well as talk to old friends from high school. And to echo the same sentiment above, I think you might be a little hard on yourself right now. You're a first time college student who just got done with their first semester. College definitely isn't easy, and it's an accomplishment to make it through each semester, no matter how big or small you feel it is. You're an amazing person (*hug*) Also, have you tried practicing some sort of self care recently? That could possibly help as well.
Oh yeah, been there done that. Just take it one day at a time, and try and break your time up into blocks of different activities. That always seems to make the time go faster. When I was still away and only home for the holidays, I broke the time up into different points to look forward to. For example, last year I got home right around December 15. There was only a week and a half until Christmas, then six days left in the year, then five days until I went back. Just keep your mind busy by whatever means necessary, and you'll survive.
Aw thanks guys, that's nice of you to reply. It's difficult to get out of the house persay because I live in a rural area without much around for a few miles and my parents don't let me drive alone. (Wtf right?) Even then, I have no money to spend and don't have any good friends nearby. And yeah, I'm very critical of myself and just not sure what to do at this point. I take medication for depression but that doesn't mean I feel happy or fulfilled. Quite the opposite really.
Hey I can really relate to your situation. I find myself doing nothing when I'm home from college, I never get out of bed and I just get stuck in the same old cycle that leaves me feeling tired all the time with no motivation to do anything. How long is your winter break? Getting a job is something that's really helped me, it might be something that you could consider, if there's any stores or cafes that are hiring near you. It forces you to get up and get going, and I feel really independent and love earning money that I can do what I want with. Just something to consider, hope you manage to work it out! I still have a full 2 months left of my break, seems impossible at this point! Good luck
If the weather's nice, take your dog for a long walk. Work out. Chat/Skype with friends from college. Read a book. Hang out with all the cool people on EC. Bake holiday treats for your family. I was bored and unemployed for like 3 months earlier this year, and I did a combination of all these things (except the dog since he's back home in California).
