Hi everyone, you might remember me or not, if not. lovely to meet you all xx Long story short: I was bullied from 2011 -2015 since sep 2015 I moved city as I was accepted into a college in a new town 6 hour car drive away, life has been so so, I thank god so much for me no longer having to be in the city that caused me to have depression. I currently suffer from depression and am on medication have been for around 6 months, generally I am ok but i feel suicidal urges that I do not want to act on at all, they are intrusive (i think thats the specific term) thoughts. But I consciously wont act on these because I want to keep on living and I have been through much worse, not to mention I really want to find my prince\ be someones I no longer see the bullies, the only times I may see them, and sadly I did see one around christmas time, is at the holidays when I go back to the old city I was a high school student in to be with the majority of my family... I must admit when walking on the street just once so I wasnt at home all day the one time, I saw a bully walking on the road with their mother -_- err... I still have memories of the bullying and currently have even at times had nightmares but its ok, they are tolerable because I know I dont have those nasty vile creatures (and I truly do call them this for everything they did to me) around me anymore. This is my update, so I am ok. I am happy most of the time, happier than I have been in such a long time, and my grades are better and people around me are so nice I do have a fear of socializing at times I just keep it to a minimal chat and sometimes some friendly conversations but I will work on that in the future, I feel my depression now is out of the "aftermath" of my stressful years because I no longer feel stressed and whenever something truly makes me sad I embrace the sadness of the moment then let it go, my therapist taught me that. I hope your all doing well and if I can help by giving advice in anyway I would like to say to those in high school being bullied or not, never suffer in silence, if you can go straight to your headmaster or even the police, one thing i really want to say is please never commit suicide, even if you feel awful. Life will get even better for me and it truly does get better after high school for you. Focus on your dreams they kept me alive at times of pure agony. I have faith in all of you xx the same way you had faith in me
Hello I can't remember if I've seen your original thread, but I'm glad that you're doing better now. And you're right, things do get better. It takes time though. I'm bipolar so I understand about depression. I'm glad that you're taking medications for it. I wish I didn't have to be on medications, but my life has also greatly improved, and my family can see the changes in my personality (Good changes). As a former victim of bullying, I can relate to that too. I graduated from high school 10 years ago this year, and the things they said to me and the names they called me, haunts me to this day, and it has really affected my self esteem and self image. One of my school friends messaged me recently and said that she saw on Facebook that one of our classmates enquired about a reunion. I'm not interested in going. I have no desire to see any of those people again. Most of them are married now anyway, and have at least two kids, so we don't really have much in common, as I'm unmarried and don't have kids. I told my mom about the planned reunion and said that I won't be going. She asked why, and after all these years, I finally told her about the bullying I endured. She was shocked, but she didn't blame me for not wanting to go. So I feel your pain, I really do. I just wish I wasn't so timid, and that I had the courage to stand up to them and nip it in the bud. But what's done is done, and I'm trying to move on from it. It's hard though. I wish bullies understood how much damage they do with their physical or verbal bullying. I wish I had punched them in the face. But I would've gotten suspended for sure. And then I wouldn't be any better than they were/are.
Stay strong friend I also wouldn't go to the reunion, I doubt there would be one someday for my class, but if there was it would be a joke if I was invited, the few friends I had in high school and still talk two didnt speak to the bullies either, which were the majority of the class, so we would be there like "ok....yeah fuck u all" I wish I had punched mine also, and once i almost grabbed the chair next to me in class and smacked it on the head of the girl behind me laughing at me and projecting homophobic words whilst the teacher of course didnt notice or care to... But then i thought "dont do it, you will go to jail, there are witnesses and they love make your life hell, imagine if they could put you away for good" so I didnt, I command you for not having hit them, just shows like me you were and will always be the bigger person, or even the person...Bullies to me arent human, they are just like dust, something annoying and bad but eventually gets blown somewhere else.
