Want a relationship with a girl, mainly attracted to guys.

Hi, so let me start of my saying that I'm so sorry if this is in the wrong place! I really did try my best to put this is the right section. Now, I identify as a pansexual female. I was born female and recently discovered my sexuality is not just straight. So, I will start off by saying, I am not attracted to women. I only am attracted to men both romantically and physically. However, I have fallen for girls before, and then I BECOME physically and romantically attracted to just that one girl. This has happened 10 times in my life. So I was only attracted to 10 girls in my entire life. That being said, I am not interested in a straight relationship. The thought of being with and falling for a girl makes me so, so happy. I am interested in movies with ONLY gay characters and I do not enjoy movies with straight relationships. What does this all mean? Why am I so charmed by lesbian relationships? Why do I want a lesbian relationship when I'm mostly attracted to men? Is my sexuality more confusing than just Pan? Am I weird?