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Was it a date or just hunging out? Should I come out?

Discussion in 'General Support and Advice' started by indaK, Jul 10, 2016.

  1. indaK

    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Jul 10, 2016
    Messages:
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    Location:
    France
    Gender:
    Male
    Sexual Orientation:
    Gay
    I´m a 22 years old gay guy, only out to my closest friend and I´ve never had a romantic relationship.

    During the last term, I started to have a crush on a good colleague of college. We have always sat together in class and help each other with homework during this three years but we never met in a non-academic context. This term our time table made us have lunch together and alone twice a week so we have shared a lot more of aspects of our live, we have had lots of fun, we have connected, I even teased him a little and since he has never been out with a girl (and gets really nervous when asked about it) I started to think maybe we could end up being more than friends.

    I am not from the city where I study (he is) but this summer I will be spending July in that city so I texted him to meet one day. At first he told me he was bussy because he was leaving on family holiday in two days but hours later he told me to go next day to his neighbourhood. We did a little sightseeing (He showed me where was his flat, his old school, the medical centre and basically made an autobiography of him using his neighbourhood), we went to a terrace to have some smoothies and then went to a park for a walk (he was really fancing this part because acording to him he wanted to see if the new mayor is taking care of the park). As he repeatedly told me when he was coming back, when we finished I told him if he wanted to repeat another day when he returned. He answered me that we could met next time to play cards with his friends.

    Ever since that day I have been overanalysing wandering if it is was a date, friends hanging out or a date that ended up with me friendzoned because we didn´t have the courage to take the next level. Would it be a good idea to tell him to repeat the plan in my neighbourhood and use that opportunity to come out to him? I fear I could end up outing myself in college and as during August I´m not going to be on the city it seems a bit like droping the bomb and running away.

    I could share a million details of that day willing to share for anyone kind enough to help me decide what that day was but I´ve decided not to tell more in this post beacuase it was already long enough. :lol:
     
  2. Euler

    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Dec 15, 2015
    Messages:
    1,061
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    Location:
    Northern Europe
    Gender:
    Male
    Gender Pronoun:
    He
    Sexual Orientation:
    Questioning
    Out Status:
    A few people
    To me nothing you told me points into the direction that a) he would be gay or b) that he would be romantically interested in you. It is clear you have a thing for him so it's quite likely that you see things you hope to see.

    Having said that you could tell him that you are gay but I would not necessarily tell him that you have feelings for him. That kind of thing tends to make friendships awkward and it takes really strong friendship to survive.