Hi, I am a bisexual woman in my 30s with a preference for men, and have fallen in love with a male colleague who is also the same orientation but prefers women and wants to marry a woman. We sit very close together in the office and all day we are dropping little hints and flirts into our conversations, but it gets so difficult!! It's really hard because the poor guy is engaged to another girl, but I don't think he is truly in love with her. His first love was a girl who ran off and left him and he has never, ever got over it. So I am terrified of making things worse for him if things go wrong with us. However, the reason she ran off has alot to do with his personality...... even though he is the most wonderful, adorable, sweet guy on the inside, it's as if he is bipolar, and maybe he is.... he has mood swings from sunny moods with a great sunny smile, to real depressive episodes with tears and shouting... and the shouting scares me... Nothing has physically happened between us yet however when i say anything to try to show him I love him, I care, or I want to progress the relationship, he has a go at me and tells me I'm "freaking him out"..... even though he will tell our friends that he loves me and wants me more than anyone, he has even hinted that he would like to marry me...!! I love the great guy inside and he is the most gorgeous guy I have ever laid eyes on but I feel like we keep on hurting each other by being so flirtatious together all day every day if he is not ready to take things further. We have both taken time off work due to the intensity of our feelings before now. So my question is, how do we maintain getting close and developing our friendship when he is so unpredictable, and also so very impulsive! If I take a day off, he thinks it means I'm never coming back even if he knows where I've gone. I think he is so afraid that one day his moods will scare me right off, and maybe I'm afraid of that too But he is always sorry for the moodiness afterwards and loves it when I'm still there for him. So my real question is how to handle this nightmare scenario without us hurting each other further, so it has a chance to develop in a positive upwards direction??? We have to work so close together too :rolle::help::help:
