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Differences between hitting on men and women

Discussion in 'General Support and Advice' started by ABeautifulMind, Sep 17, 2016.

  1. ABeautifulMind

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    Are there any?

    I mean, I know how to hit on a woman well enough... But I have never hit on a guy.. Are there any differences one should be aware of?

    I know that sounds like a stupid question, but with women for example I always exhibit confidence, use a reasonable amount of eye contact, dont look at her chest lol, speak clearly, start with a little push pull type deal (interest followed by disinterest... you know :stuck_out_tongue_closed_eyes: ) once you have broken the ice, ask questions about her usually involved music or something else universally shared, actually listen so you can respond, im just gonna end with etc...

    Im confused though about hitting on guys, because lets be honest, guys are different psychologically.. I was trying to think of what I would respond to and honestly I have no idea.... I doubt the typical methods of hitting on women and picking them up will work on guys... But seeing as I have no experience with guys, I really dont know that to be true, im just assuming...

    I had to work a long time on how to approach women, I really hope I dont have to learn a whole new set of "instructions" for lack of a better word....

    How does everyone here pick up guys? Are there any methods that you care to share?

    Thanks in advance :stuck_out_tongue_closed_eyes:
     
  2. killswitch0029

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    I've only hit on guys when I'm drunk so whenever I do it I come across as a bit crass. The one situation where it kind of worked we were smoking a bowl so it was more like a bonding kind of thing.
    When I flirt with girl (yes, I'm gay and I flirt with girls. It's fun.) it's usually just sweet talking back and forth.

    So if I had to give some sort of advice (even though I'm only going off of one experience because genuinely suck at flirting with guys) being on mutual ground would probably help, like in my case smoking, which led into conversation.

    Sorry if my tips suck, but I tried :slight_smile:
     
  3. ABeautifulMind

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    lol, yea anyone I could even consider being with would have to be 420 friendly at least...

    Apparently I have been told with guys there is a lot more nonverbal communication than with women..

    IDK still trying to figure it all out so I dont make an ass of myself :stuck_out_tongue_closed_eyes:

    well, so I dont make a big ass of myself, because you have to be WILLING to make a small ass of yourself to hit on almost anyone lol... I just mean you need that kind of confidence :stuck_out_tongue_closed_eyes:
     
  4. andimon

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    I have no idea how to hit on men, because I can't see myself even starting a conversation with someone of the same gender - I simply have little to nothing in common with (most of) them.

    However, I think the methods differ a lot from a person to person. And while this may sound unpopular, not all women respond as well to the "generic" pick up lines and hitting. Some actually prefer deeper topics and actually sharing relevant stuff, but most just adapt to how society sees flirting so that they fit in.

    I don't think I'd mind a guy hitting on me in any particular way, as long as they're respectful and smart about it.
     
  5. ABeautifulMind

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    Well, I usually save the deep stuff for later.. I usually try to stay on hobbies and interests... Theirs usually, mine when there is crossover.. But that is not how I start a conversation with them, you know what I mean? Im addressing the ice breaker or pick up line or whatever you want to call the initial introduction, that should establish your interested and trying to see if they are interested as well...

    Ill be honest my bread and butter is when a chick is into anything scientific... Then im set... I am very well versed in science.. So if I can get the convo into that area I am usually set too... But in my experience, a little flattery that doesnt get deep or smothery (not a word i know) has always worked to some degree... to start the convo.. whether it continues depends then on hobbies and such.. I guess what I am trying to say is, with women I know how to start the convos sufficiently, but with guys I feel like if i used the same technique it would be really awkward... I know once the conversation is going how to converse/flirt and all... Im not worried about flirting once the conversation is going, I am worried about being able to "hit on them" to get the convo going without it being awkward, but in such a way that anyone would know I was interested and not just being friendly...

    I have a few ideas, but I am just trying to see if anyone has some suggestions from their experience... ESPECIALLY specific social cues while hitting on guys, that is what would probably help me the most tbh... For example a girl checking her phone, looking at the clock a lot, never making eye contact, refusing a drink, etc all illustrate disinterest. I know a lot of those things will apply regardless of gender, but I have heard with guys there are some differences, that I REALLY didnt expect, for example a guy accepting a drink but paying for it himself does not imply disinterest apparently... which with women it definitely would... So I am looking to make sure I dont make any blunders because I am unaware of things like that...

    Any examples/experiences/suggestions?