I have been with my partner for 5 years.In the last year she moved home to take care of her mom.We have only seen each other twice in that time,but we talk on the phone.I always used to drive 2 hours to see her but it got old.I have asked her to come see me but there is always an excuse.Now I find out she wants to go to the Bahamas with her straight friends.She doesn't seem to have time for me but her friends she does.Should I end the relationship? It doesn't feel the same anymore.
Hey Coolstar64, IMO, one of the most important elements of a relationship is communication. Have you talked to your partner about this? Does she know that you are feeling neglected? Is it really an end to the relationship that you want? Or that she wants? Maybe she feels the same way. Maybe not. Maybe she isn’t even aware of your perception that the relationship has hit a dead-end. To me, if a relationship is at an end, the best way to end it is mutually and without animosity – that brings closure to both parties and can even leave them as good friends, if they both desire that. (Sadly that happens far too rarely, in my experience.) Just some thoughts.
We have talked about it but it seems she doesn't care.I asked her to move back in but she has excuses.I don't want this relationship to go on like it is with hardly any communication.It seems like we are just friends.
That's too bad, Coolstar64.:icon_sad: But it doesn't sound like there really is any relationship anymore and you are ready to move on. I'd just suggest you might try to end it formally and as amicably as possible from your side so that you can have closure. From what you just said, it sounds like your partner will be indifferent to it - but you never know. Best of luck!
It's hard to communicate effectively if the other person is not keen to talk to you. Don't beat yourself. Why not give her sone space? Not totally end the relationship but kind of break for both of you. Rest. You can date somebody else and she can too if that's what she wants. Say give yourselves 2 months. If you wait for her closure, before you move on, you might be waiting for nothing because she may not be sure on what she wants. You have to have life and while she's trying to configure her life, you are not stagnant. That's my opinion.
We gave each other several months of space were she wash trying to figure out what she wants.She has yet to make up her mind.I don't want to hand around another 6 months when I could be moving on.
Did the two of you agree to a specific amount of time or just "several months" in general while she's trying to figure out what she wants?
