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abusive relationship

Discussion in 'General Support and Advice' started by natalielight, Oct 26, 2016.

  1. natalielight

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    I've been in a straight marriage for nearly 10 years and my partner is extremely verbally and psychologically abusive. Now, on the verge of finally coming out, I feel like I'd be endangering myself with no family here to lean on for support.I feel scared,but at the same time I've reached that point when I can't carry on any more.The continuous swearing and humiliation, disgracing and shaming that literally killed a part of me.. I've never felt so little in my life. I feel like a child that has to stand against this scary tyrant to break free. I know I got it in me, but life has been tough lately. Lots of bad thoughts, deep depression, feelings of worthlessness and helplessness. Just not sure where to start. ..
     
  2. DJHale

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    Hi,
    I can relate to how you feel. I'm only 16, but majority of my relationships are abusive. The last one was the worst. Know, that you have a large community of people right here who support you. The National Domestic Violence Hotline | 24/7 Confidential Support
    This is website is for those who are in your situation. I think that the main priority is for you to worry about your safety. Fill someone you trust, perhaps a friend, in on your situation. I would try to find as many resources for people in your situation.

    You can also call the authorities before something very serious happens. I know they'll possibly want evidence, so maybe discretely record the abuse, and show it to them.

    I hope this helps, and gives you guidance. Please be safe, and let me know if I can continue to help.
     
  3. Poppy43

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    Theres Womens Aid in Manchester Contact you could ring for advise and theres a domestic violence unit in all of the major police forces so there will also be one in Manchester who could help. You could ring the non emergency number 101 and ask to be put through or to get them to ring you back. I think you need an action plan regarding getting away for him and being safe.Hopefully you'll be able to sort something out.
     
    #3 Poppy43, Oct 26, 2016
    Last edited: Oct 26, 2016
  4. wickedwitch

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    Hi natalielight:

    I, too, support you in seeking help for your situation from whatever domestic violence agency is available to you - there are people there who have been in your situation who can guide you in making effective decisions for yourself while helping to maintain your safety.

    I personally think it's important to access this type of help before attempting to leave a psychologically abusive situation, as sometimes leaving can "cause" (you are not to blame!) the situation to escalate to physical violence. It did in my case. So having a plan in place before leaving is paramount.

    Please keep writing if you need to.

    :slight_smile:
     
  5. natalielight

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    Thank you so much for your care,concern,advice and insight. I will use all that and hopefully it will be fine. I guess sometimes you just have to take that leap of faith for things to improve, to live the life you want and deserve. Your words of support and encouragement mean more to me than i could ever describe.