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First date ever as a woman--advice?

Discussion in 'General Support and Advice' started by KitSylph, Jan 16, 2017.

  1. KitSylph

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    So the short version of the story is that I'm bi-gender, and I am comfortable switching back and forth between genders consciously. When I'm female, if I'm not alone and engrossed in something (and sometimes when I am), I take the time to present fully as female. I have no idea how close I am to passable.

    I'm pansexual and in a committed, open relationship, and my partner and I have decided that it's time I go out and try dating, especially dating men, as a woman.

    This weekend I may have my first date ever as a woman, which would also be my first date ever with a man. It may also be my first time out among the general public in female mode. It occurs to me that it might have been smart to arrange a safe outing as a female before trying to date as a female.

    Anyway, I'm feeling a little nervous about all this, and I'd really appreciate any advice anyone may have!
     
  2. Mariana

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    Wow, congratulations! Sounds like a big step for you, I hope it goes well!

    To be honest, I don't know how useful any advice I might give can be because I have only ever presented myself to the world as female. I've never experienced anything else so I don't know what it's like to go out in public as a woman for the first time.

    I think it's important that you're as comfortable as possible on your date. Like, if he says or does anything that makes you uncomfortable, it's perfectly fine to just leave. Hopefully, your date is a nice person who wants to get to know you and respects you. That's what a date should be, right? Just a fun time with another person you want to get to know better. Ideally, gender shouldn't matter at all. I don't know if you want to discuss your gender identity with your date but that's 100% up to you.

    Try to have fun, I guess, is the only advice I have. If it goes well that's great, but if for some reason it doesn't don't let it discourage you.
     
  3. KitSylph

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    Thanks, Mariana! I really appreciate the encouragement.

    I've been connecting with potential dates through *******, and I'm very clear about my gender there, so no surprises for my dates. :slight_smile: ******* has been working well for me so far. I did upgrade to the embarassingly-named "A-list".