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hello everyone

Discussion in 'General Support and Advice' started by Heidifleiss, Feb 10, 2017.

  1. Heidifleiss

    Regular Member

    Joined:
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    Location:
    Barrie
    I'm very new around here. I escaped a bad 9 year relationship 2 years ago and just started trying to date 2 months ago. I had this problem with just giving a guy whatever he wants, it didn't bother me. I just give the sex to get the companionship, or money or whatever. Ive dated all kinds of men. Fat, skinny, nerd, alcoholic, pot head, sharp dressed man. I wasnt sexually attracted to any of them. I would usually rub one out later on my own. The guy I left, just a monster. Longest running mistake in my life. I took my daughter and ran.

    So Ive been very happily single I think for two years. Ive dated three gentlemen over that time. They were all perfectly fine well dressed, business owners, drug free, non smoking gentlemen. My dream dates! They start touching me and I am repulsed. I was sickened by them touching me, kissing . . . . . the sex. I am a sex worker so it was easy to power through it. But I wasn't happy. As usual.

    I promised myself I wouldn't settle again. Over these two years, Ive been happy alone with my steadily growing collection of animals. which makes me think maybe I am lonely, so I go on a date again and at the end of the night I feel like my skin is crawling when they touch me.

    Throughout my life, my peers would ask me if I was a lesbian. Even my mother at some point. I never was worried about dressing attractively for a man. I would dress like a guy and cut my hair off. Im very hygienic I just don't look like a girl usually. In my small town though, if your parents were gay then you probably will get beaten up. Nobody would ever openly say that. I like being around other girls in a state of undress. I like to see what their bodies look like compared to mine. I admire the human form. I see naked guys all the time I want to see some girls.

    So now I think Ive figured out why I'm lonely. Great now I can be lonely in a whole other world. And even bigger one

    so does any of this stuff sound familiar to any of y'all?
     
  2. Heidifleiss

    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Feb 10, 2017
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    Location:
    Barrie
    Jee thanks everyone for your input and support I hope everyone was good to you when you came out