Hi all, It's taken me a lot to come here today...for years I've been questioning my sexuality as I've always been unsure. When I was younger I experimented with my female friends and the only porn that actually turns me on is lesbian porn. I've had relationships with men and think I've been in love but every relationship has failed. I find other females pretty but I've never looked at another female and thought I'd like a relationship but I'm not too sure if that's because I think only along the lines of relationships with men. I just feel a little confused.... Kez xx
Congratulations on your first post! You had to go through signing up and all that, so you have take some concrete steps. Experimenting... everyone does it. It sounds like you don't regret it. Your guess that your "gay imagination" might be stunted because "because I think only along the lines of relationships with men." is 1) very self-aware, good on you, 2) very common, 3) is a thing with a name even "heteronormativity". It is annoyingly hard to shrug off. So the short summary, the view from the outsider's perspective: you sound mostly gay, your confusion is normal, and common, and you are smart enough to figure things out. Good luck! ---------- Post added 27th Feb 2017 at 04:12 PM ---------- Oh, and my advice: browse through other peoples' stories here. Vast amounts of useful info.
It's okay to question your sexuality. I questioned my sexuality in high school. I think I'm bisexual. You have a long life ahead of you to figure out who you are. Figuring out who you are shouldn't be rushed. Just take your time. Let those feelings flow. Give yourself time. You don't have to have it all figured out today. Eventually you'll reach a point in which you'll be able to judge and examine your sexuality for yourself. In the mean time, just focus on being you. Don't let this stress you out.
Maybe you are straight with gay tendencies. I wouldn't say you are a lesbian because you are romantically attracted to men but bi is also a jump because you dont see yourself with women.
I don't see myself with women as I've never been with a woman but it takes me to think about lesbian porn or watch it to get turned on which is why I'm questioning it if that makes sense? I keep thinking I'm bi as I find both sexes attractive....confused as hell!!
I wouldn't put too much stock in porn as an indicator of sexuality on its own. It's possible it could help form part of a larger picture, but only if other things are going on. What happened in your relationships with men you've dated? If you don't mind saying so, why did they end, and how did you feel about them ending? Also, as you say and as others have pointed out, it's entirely possible that you're simply not used to the idea of two women dating as "normal." This can take some getting used to when coming out and coming to terms with your orientation. Try thinking of it in smaller steps - what do you think of the idea of going out on a date with a woman? Or just flirting with a woman? And so forth.
