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It's stronger than me.

Discussion in 'General Support and Advice' started by Nox, Apr 26, 2017.

  1. Nox

    Nox
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    Lately I feel like too many things are happening at the same time and I can't even process it. I'm on my last year of highschool, which in Chile is way shorter than any other school year, so they just hit you with tons of information, tests, practical workshops and the pressure to decide what you wanna do for the rest of your life and how exactly you are going to get there. It's exhausting, and then there's my personal life; I have a friend how is going through some hard stuff right now and really wants and needs my help, and at the same time I'm struggling with my gender identity and some aspects of my sexual orientation.
    Please excuse my language, but I feel like shit. I can't deal with everything at a time, I'm just one person and I'm not enough. I'm getting sick almost every week now, I can't focus when someone's talking to me, nor can I focus at class, I'm forgetting everything (even things I've promised, and that pisses people off, which just makes me feel guilty and more stressed). I also have trouble sleeping and that doesn't help my mood.
    I'm permanently scared and jumpy, like something's gonna go wrong, sometimes I feel like I want to cry really badly, and I don't even want to get out of my bed anymore, everything seems too hard and I just wanna disappear. Any advice? :frowning2:

    P.S. I'm sorry if there are many mistakes, my cellphone keeps trying to "correct" my writing into spanish words.
    P.P.S. I know my actual mood doesn't match the one stated on my profile, it's just that I can't change it from my pone lol.
     
  2. Gravity

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    Not to state the obvious, but it sounds like you're juggling a lot - and that's probably starting to take its toll, as you say you are having trouble focusing, you're getting sick a lot, and so on.

    Maybe it's time to re-evaluate what you can handle, and what you can't. For example, I'm sure your friend is going through a rough time as you say - but is it your job to help, as opposed to anybody else? Can you help them, without putting yourself in a tough spot as a result? It wouldn't be a bad thing to find someone who can devote more energy to your friend, and leave you to handle some of the more personal issues you're struggling with. And possibly, after some time to devote to settling things in your own life, you'll be able to be a source of support for your friend again.

    Of course it's up to you what you want to back out of, but I think that stopping over-committing yourself would be a good start.
     
  3. Nox

    Nox
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    That sounds like a really good and logical advice. It's hard, tho, to feel like I'm turning my back on other people, and it's always been hard for me to say "no", or understanding that I can't fix everything, but I think I've pretty much hit my limits, so I will try to do what you suggested, it might be what I need.

    Thanks a lot, Gravity, I feel a bit less lost now and that's always a good think :slight_smile: thanks to all the people who read this as well, the view counter helps me feel less alone.
    Best wishes to you all.
     
  4. FlightyBrannigan

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    Hey Nox, keep your head up. As one who has just overcome this, I know how you feel. What I recommend is sitting down with someone you trust and talking with them about how you feel. Thats what really helped me to figure out what I needed to do and it also helped me be more open to my feelings. I hope that everything works out for the best.
     
  5. Nox

    Nox
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    Hey Cooldude, thanks for answering :slight_smile: I'm really glad to hear you overcame a similar thing, makes me happy for you, and also kinda gives me hope :')

    I actually talked about this with a therapist, but I couldn't really open up about what was actually happening becuase it feels too selfish to say that I want to stop being there for others (I know that's not exactly the case, and that I can't help everyone and do everything, but it just feels wrong to stop "being helpful" all the time), and I can't even think of telling someone close to me, because they might misunderstand it (as in thinking I want to tell them something in between the lines), or think I'm over reacting, or on the complete opposite scenario, they might think I'm depresive and get overly worried. Also and most importantly, I don't really want to get into it with them, but thanks a lot for the advise, I will try to discuss this with my therapist more in depth and see if that helps. Thanks again and best wishes! I hope your mood stays happy, as your profile states :grin:
    Also, that's a really good quote you have on your signature!