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Not how I expected?

Discussion in 'General Support and Advice' started by kni, May 8, 2017.

  1. kni

    kni
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    I didn't know if I should put this in the coming out thread but I put it her because I'm not really asking about how to come out more just about my feelings?

    Ok so I recently came out to my mom and two sisters.:icon_bigg They reacted well and I'm proud of myself for actually being able to do it. I haven't told my dad yet and I'm not sure when I will.

    Anyway the thing I wanted to talk about was that coming to my mom wasn't really how I pictured it. She reacted well and that was surprising but the biggest surprise was that i didn't feel better. Idk I guess I expected to feel happy that my mom accepted me and I I do but I still don't feel good. I think part of me wants her to apologise. For so long I felt terrible about myself because the thought of them not accepting me drove me crazy. I didn't care if anyone else didn't support me as long as I had her and my dad and even the sliver of doubt grew to a mammoth sized paranoia. But she hasn't done anything wrong and none of that was her fault all of that was in my head. If anything shouldn't I apologize for not trusting her? She said she will always love me so why do I still feel like she won't?

    This feeling is the other reason I haven't told my dad. I don't think it would matter because it wouldn't make me feel better either.

    I love my parents and I'm lucky to have them. All the worrying I did about them not accepting me seems so silly to me now but I wish I didn't feel so distant from them.

    I wanted to know if any of you have had similar experiences? Am I making a big deal out of nothing and will this feeling go away?:confused:
     
  2. Dollop

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    not out myself, but maybe u were expecting too much? maybe its just new feel and unfamilar? sound like u had a lot on ur mind for a while might take a few days for it to sink in what has happened :slight_smile:
     
  3. beenthrdonetht

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    You're not making a big deal out of nothing... but this feeling will go away. The fact that you pretty much guessed where it is coming from is a good sign. Of course it might foreshadow a life of overthinking... but really I'm JK, not thinking is much worse. Just go make your parents proud, like you were going to do anyway.