Interaction with ppl

I think we all wonder if that guy or gal across the room is interested in us as much as we are them. I tend to look at eyes see where they drift. You can catch them looking at things they are attracted to. If he or she looks at the same sex when they walk by they may be gay or bi at best.

 

If it's any consolation, I know guys who do this with EVERY guy they come across.

It's tough to give advice since my mind doesn't work like that. Mine has always been "He's probably straight. If I find out he's gay, great, I'll go from there, but for now, he's straight and nothing but a potential friend."

Lex

 

Ohh yes! I'm exactly like that! And most of the times if the girl gives me some attention I immediately think "Yes, she is!!" and I usually start being attracted by her (unless I find her really ugly)... I can't help it !!!!!! Maybe because I've just started to accept my sexuality and also maybe because I've never been with a girl and I probably want it so bad!!! Don't know...so...you're not alone! And I feel like a perv too, I can't look girls in the eyes because I'm afraid they will understand that I'm a lesbian and that they will be scared by me...ufhfhfh...:rolle:

 

I do this too, and my advice would be to not do that as much as you can help it! I just recently got over this six-month long crush that I had on a girl who has been in my classes for 5 semesters in a row. I'd sit next to her every day, and we chat here and there (mostly about school though so I don't know much personal information about her). Anyways, what I do, and what a lot of people do, is project onto their crushes.

We project ideals and beliefs onto that person that we want to be true to make them seem more amazing than they really are. For instance, if you want to know if she is gay and you really hope that she is, then your mind starts to make up things/signs to convince yourself that she's gay. You will pick up on mannerisms, clothing styles, things that she says, and tell yourself that those could be indications of her sexuality. Then you start to tell yourself that there's always a possibility she could be gay and get your hopes up. And you're feeling all nervous and psyching yourself up for even the most mundane conversation. This is everything that I did, and I suspect that's what you're feeling, too. We idealize the person and ignore any faults that we find, hoping that this could turn into something. In the end, I found out that she's straight, and surprisingly, I was able to stop my feelings pretty quickly. Now, I don't wonder about her anymore, and I can be around her without constantly feeling on edge.

Moral of the story: don't make yourself go crazy or lead yourself on until you find some real info about her orientation. You'll end up wasting a lot of time and mental energy on someone who's not even remotely available. I know it's hard to control your feelings, but try to find out—one way or another—if she's straight or gay. Then you can rationalize your thoughts and behaviors.