We live in the same street and I only see her once a month, sometimes every week... The funny thing is though, I've known her for almost 10 years. I used to sit behind her on the bus for years. We even went to the same school for awhile and I always kind of noticed her, I guess, I knew she looked and acted differently from the other girls but I didn't know why I thought that. Actually, I only admitted to myself that I was not bisexual (as I wanted to believe from the age of 16) but a lesbian in December last year. Last month or before that, I saw her on the bus and suddenly I felt as if an arrow shot through me. It was a weird feeling. I saw her a couple of times after that while we were waiting for the same bus or just walking past each other and I felt really giddy and warm inside and every feeling I thought I'd never feel. It is driving me crazy. I've never actually talked to her but we have mutual friends or acquaintances.. I feel like I'm stalking her on facebook.. She goes to university in another town and I know on which days she leaves and arrives home and I always go for a walk on those days on the same route that I know she would be taking. In your experience/opinion, how long does it take to get over someone when you see them regularly? (In addition to me being attracted to her, I'm angry at her because of it and I hope it doesn't show when I steal glances at her when I hope she's not looking but she must think I'm an idiot or just very rude anyway.. and I feel guilty for all of that as well.) PS please excuse any mistakes, I'm not a native speaker of English. :icon_redf
Welcome to EC! The three things that help you get over a crush are time, distance, and somebody else to focus on. Time will take care of itself. If you can't help the distance, then perhaps you should be looking for other friends (and potential girlfriends?) to fill the void. Lex
Is talking to her out of the question? Or do you prefer not to know her even as a possible future friend?
Yes. I mean I've known her for almost 10 years, or rather seen her while we were waiting for the same bus or seen her on the bus. It would look very weird if all of a sudden I said hi at the bus stop. It'd would be even more embarrassing because it's a small town and normally you'd greet people at the bus stop where see them everyday but I just never did that because I felt that if I didn't really know them then I'm not going to bother even if I'm being rude. Although we did went to the same school at one point but I guess I was too shy to say anything because she was a few years above me. And then a few years later we took the same bus every morning to secondary school so that was another opportunity for me to say hi but I didn't. So now I can't start. :bang: I'd really like to talk to her though and I'm 98% sure that she is gay. I'm not even sure if it's a real crush or not. But every time I see her, I feel weird but happy at the same time because I know that there are others like me and they even live nearby. :icon_bigg
I dunno, I might try. I had something kinda similar with a girl on my lacrosse team. (In retrospect I had a major crush on her lol). I never said a word to her until ninth grade though I knew her from long before then. I wish I knew how to help past Lex’s great advice because I think I have a current someone more like in your situation. I’m in the stage of freak-out-and-deny just in case there is something lol. It’s hard when you see the potential crush often. Definitely a :bang: moment lol. Good luck! (*hug*)
With regular contact, it may be difficult. What you can do is stop checking up on her. Stop checking her FB wall. Spend more time doing things that interest you, and especially spend more time around friends. It helps a lot to have friendships to distract yourself with.
That is a real crush. Are you friends on Facebook? If you are friends on Facebook, it's kind of weird not to greet her in real life. What makes you so sure she is a lesbian?
No, but two of my friends are friends with her, that's how I can see her wall on fb. I don't mean to sound rude when I say this but she looks like one. She walks in a certain way, that is definitely not very feminine, always had short hair (I know that doesn't necessarily mean anything), wears unisex clothing. And I went through all her likes on facebook and it had TV shows like The L Word and Lip Service and a few other lgbt movies. The character called Kim from Better Than Chocolate reminds me of her a lot.
