Hey everyone!!! This is my first time posting here I'm new not only to the site but actually new to accepting myself as gay!. So to the point!! I've always been hiding in plain sight I'm not fem to any extent! I played football from age 8, I love fast cars and my current job well.. has no room for the weak or the fem lol ! But I have this problem with knowing how to make the first move.. Like do I just dive in and like go for a kiss or do I just straight up tell them how I feel? I have no gay or bi friends to help me out with this so any advice would be really helpful! Oh!! and another thing how can I really tell if a guy is Gay or how can I let other gay guys I'm gay? Is there places I can go or things I can do? Any advice would be highly appreciated lol Thanks y'all!
hey welcome to ec man. well the only way to tell if someone is gay is if they tell you they are.i wish i could tell you where to buy a gaydar ive looked every where on eBay no luck aye.there's lots of gay guys into cars. sports.heaps of people here on ec seem to really love their guns(we are like spies aye) depending where you live and age you could join a lgbt group. but going to one can be pretty nerve racking. being out exposing ourselves to people is pretty hard the first time. but if you wanna meet someone you are going to have to let at least one person know. personally i would prob freak a bit if a gay just came out and kissed me.personally id like someone to offer me cash cake coke then tell me they like me.but lots of little hints like telling them things you like about them and seeing there reaction ect.
ha ha ha thanks burg! yeah after I posted I thought about that for a sec and was like hmm most likely not the best approach ha ha ha :bang: so im in California! and im sure there have to be a handful of lgbt groups but how do I find them?
I suggest you do things that do not hide that you are gay. As long as you do not hide, then it will become known to other gay guys. We tend to see it or have a hunch when we see other gay men. No talk of girl friend, or old girl friends. Join a gym where gay men are known to go. Then when you are in a group, and you want to let some of them know you are gay, but want to be subtle, mention that your legs are sore, been working out very hard lately. Someone may ask what kind of excercises you have been doing. Someone else may ask where, or what gym. Then you can answer, I work out at "Hot Jox Training" in the Boy's town district. There are ways to let certain people know, and others will not exactly figure it out. As far as making a move, I have found that asking if someone is gay or bi is the least successful way of finding out. Asking if they like some guys, or have ever fooled around with another guy is better. Or if they would like to play around. The labeling of "are you gay" is sometimes, or often, not what works. If you ask them when they are alone, it rarely gets taken wrong. Do not blow a chance when you think things are heating up, and you are alone with Mr. Hawt!!!! I have blown a few of those times when I just could not break the ice and ask or state what I wanted. Even just saying "you are in great shape, what do you do to get there"? Get the subject to their find physical condition. This says a lot, but you can get out of it if it goes wrong. Just get the subject to know you admire them physically, and that should reveal something, and still keep it in a safe place. Then I would wait until the next time that you are alone with them to say more. If you never get them alone again, it might not be right. If they make a move to get together again, that says that they like you at least some. It is two steps forward, and one back. It is not an easy one step process in general. Eye contact gives you some clue. If they stare into your eyes and hold that stare, do not look away, but keep locked for at least 15 to 25 seconds, this is a common way for people to let each other know something is brewing.
