I can't cope. Everything is too hard, the funny thing? Nothing is wrong, but everything is wrong at the same time. I feel tourtured, angry at myself. I feel like i'm in a crowded room, screaming at the top of my lungs and no one looks up (Titanic quote). I feel as if there is no reason for me to be here. That I cause more upset than happiness, my parents, my class mates, my old friends hate me. The closest thing I have to a friend now is someone I hate. Why do I hate him? No reason, one of the many reasons I hate myself. today I ran a screwdriver down the side of my arm, cutting it minorly. I don't know why I did that, what do I do?
You aren't insane. From what you describe you are in the middle of a lot of extreme emotional turmoil. It's okay if you don't know why you feel this way. Just because you can't label the thing that is "wrong" don't mean your feelings aren't legitimate. And none of this makes you insane. What you need to do first is put away the screwdriver so you don't cut yourself anymore. Cutting or scratching is not the answer. Tools don't tend to be very clean so please go wash and disinfect the cut you made so it doesn't get infected. Next you need to find an outlet for these bottled up emotions so that you can let them out. You can scream if you feel like you need to scream. Go running. Talk to someone if you think you can manage it. Take a nap (okay not everyone recommends this but I find it makes me feel better). Do something to release some of the pressure these emotions are causing. When did these feelings start? Did an event trigger them? A series of events? Have you felt like this before?
You're Not Going Insane, Insanity is extremely Deep Mental Distress and stuff, It Seems that what you are going through is emotional, Step 1 - Put Away The Screwdriver! Step 2 - try to find what is Irritating you and snuff it out, Safely Step 3 - Tend to stay away from things that could cause you pain Sorry Haven't Got much to say
