Anyone ever feel like this? It's kinda making me even more insecure. Everyone is better than me at everything. Better looking, smarter, more successful in life, more courageous, better social life. And then there's me. I'm the worst at everything.
Yup, used to feel like this a lot. Including when I was around your age and a lot younger. And sometimes when I was a bit older. I got better and so will you I bet. You're still very young (yes, I know it doesn't feel that way) and you've got a lot of developing as a person still to do. There will always be someone who is better than you at one thing or another (and always someone better than them too). The trick is to be your best self and not worry about others unless you think you can learn from them and thereby improve your own skills (and always keep an eye out for those opportunities). Eventually, you'll either start to not care how you compare to others or you'll start to find that you are better than others at some things. Especially you may find some skills or tasks that you not only really like but are very good at (probably because you really like doing them). Hope this helps, Todd
because what's the point of being better if you're of no value? people less than you have the ability to be of more value any more than you are to those better. so ling as you can interact with this world, you are of limitless value. and that's why you shouldn't worry about it.
Yeah, a lot. But the way I see it, no matter how good I am at whatever I do, there will always be someone better somewhere. Therefore, it's completely pointless to think about anybody else's life (I know, easier said than done) and just focus on making myself the best I can be. I'm sure you're not the worst at everything. I take that crown when it comes to driving (I've taken 2 lessons and did quite a bit of damage both times) :lol: so there's already one thing that you're definitely not the worst at.
But it's like there are people who are only 23 who have real jobs, who are in a long term relationship, who are happy and who have life to look forward to. Here I am, struggling to just be the status quo. I'm already 19 and I have none of that to ever look forward to. What's the point of living if I'm just a pile of uselessness?
you don't know if everything they do is just a facade. maybe they don't like their job. or their partner. or just fake happy
I feel like this a lot. I've always acknowledged 'Don't Let Me Get Me' by Pink as more of a personal reference than a song. Your life is your life, don't go by anyone else's standards. You don't owe anything to society or anyone else, do what makes you happy. Just because you know someone who might have more success than you because they pursued a specific path in life, doesn't make than any worse or better than you. I'm 21 and have not yet pursued college, yet, there are 21 yos out there already with careers in Hospitals, Law Offices, and whatever else. I don't really care because I'm content with where I am now. If you're unhappy the way you're living, do what you can to change it. But don't do it simply because you're feeling inadequate because someone has a 'better life' than you.
I used to have this problem. Sometimes, it still bothers me. But, what I really encourage you to do is to think positively. You are very unique and special to someone, and something that took me a while to realize is that everyone has issues. The people that appear to have everything together in their life have their own problems, even if you can't see them. Try not to compare yourself to others. There are some things that I'm sure that you are wonderful at that make you a valued member of society. Also, don't believe anyone who says that you aren't good enough, because those people are often hiding their insecurities by focusing the attention on someone else. Always remember that you are worthwhile. Something else that I like to do is to write down a list of positive attributes about myself with things I can improve upon. If you can't improve your situation or problem, just try to focus on the positive things that you wrote.
I know a girl (we're not really friends) who is a few months younger than me, has a great boyfriend, is doing way better in college than I am is going to inherit over €20 million next year after her from the sale of the AIRLINE her father sold before he died. Some people are just lucky and everything comes easy to them. I'm broke, single and working my ass off for a degree that's probably not going to get me a job anytime soon, but it doesn't really bother me so much anymore. You'll never get what you want unless you go out and take it. You never know what's around the corner, and that's kind of exciting. The status quo isn't all that it's cracked up to be, not having everything figured out is kind of exciting - it makes life more of an adventure. We're at an age (I'm 20) where we feel like we should be grown up now and have everything in place and it's really awkward and there's a lot of pressure, but don't stress over it. So many people are in the same boat. You're definitely not a pile of uselessness just because you dont have your life figured out at 19 - You still have like 60-70 years to do that.
To the OP, just know that even at my tender age, there is no "plan" and there never has been a plan, I do what feels right at the moment, sometimes I succeed and sometimes I fail, but I remember someone saying that both success and failure are actually impostors, both "success" and "failure" are illusions...
I have absolutely no good traits. None, nada, zilch. I'm not starting college till I'm 21. For some reason everyone I know believes I'm some incredible genius who knows everything. I'm not good at anything. Both of my old IT instructors just moved on to 100k+ a year jobs and they are barely 30 years old. It's almost as if I'm meant to feel this way. This feeling of inadequacy really sucks, and I can't seem to shake it. I realize that this is just turning into a rant. I apologize for this.
if it makes you feel better, i have seen some people in college who could be my parents or even grandparents! EDIT: age is not a deciding factor for college. some people start college like everyone else, but then drop out and may or may not return. some people need to work for a few years to save money, and possibly even to find an interest before going to college. some people graduate with a major and don't like their field and have to go back for a different major. Some even are stuck with loans and can't change major.
You need to start liking yourself more! I know that sounds silly but it's true. Everybody has good traits as well as bad. I Personally don't like many of my traits, but a lot of the traits that I don't particularly like are the traits that my friends like most (i.e. I can be extremely blunt and sarcastic). Clearly other people see a lot in you if they put you on this genius pedastal, you just need to see within yourself more of what they see and like about you.
Bruz your 19 man!!! your way too young to think like that. if it helps i became a dad when i was 14 and my world was shattered... i had the worst reputation with parents, got taken of the football team, school band and so i had to work hard to be trusted by everyone especially my rentz... they were hated coz i popped the preachers kid and my rents were meant to be evanglists in the church etc.... so i know what its like but man... you pick your self up coz no one will so get your head outa the gutter and do something about it... coz sitting there and feeling sorry for yourself aint gonna get you no where... sorry to sound like a dick but i just wanna help a bro out
I didn't start getting my life together until I was 27. It took me 6yrs to get thru college and I will just finish paying off my student loans this coming May (my family was dirt freakin poor btw). In my past I've had long term relationships which failed, attempts at relationships which failed, sometimes in really weird ways (hint: dating an ex-con, who's day job turns out to be being a courier for one of the biggest cocaine dealers in town, and who totals a Maserati while test driving it putting him back in prison for several years--not recommended as your first attempt at a boyfriend). I have had the same car repoed twice in my life and been on a first name basis with collection depts. I make about one half to one third what most of my friends make. And you know what? I'm really very happy and love my life. I got into the call center industry at 27 and then into training and instructional design which I really like and am quite good at. My boss seems to think I walk on water. I met my partner who I love dearly. Between us we make a very comfortable living and while we aren't jetting off to vacation in Europe or the like we own and do most of the things we want or decide we want. My friends are great folks and lots of fun to be around. And so on. The point here is that you have a lot of years and living yet to do and there are lots of changes yet to come in your life. Things may not be ideal just now, but you have lots of time to make your life what you want it to be. Things really do get better. But you've got to be willing to work for it. Todd:smilewave
Maybe I should think more positively. I just feel so old. I'm 19 for Pete's sake. Even worse is.that I'm still living at home with my parents.
19 is definitely not old. It's maybe just because you're coming close to your 20s and you feel like you should have everything together. I freaked out when I turned 20 a couple of months ago. It's completely normal to feel like this. I know people who live at home at way older ages than 19. I still live at home when I'm not in college and so does my housemate and she's almost 30.
I'm in the same boat. Especially when it comes to looks or being courageous. But I don't really think I'm less smart than anyone. I'm just self conscious and it affects my social life most of the time.
