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Low self worth I'm trying honestly

Discussion in 'General Support and Advice' started by Momigi, Apr 9, 2013.

  1. Momigi

    Regular Member

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    Hey I'm kinda lost on what to do I have no actual value for myself I know its a common thing and I should just get over it but I can't any advice would do I've prepared a nice little background story for ya to better understand where I think I might have developed it

    Early Years (6-12): When I was younger I was a bit of a oddball at a young age never got along with my family because everybody always thought of me as a freak I was sickly back then too so I was pumped full of steroids to boost my immune system so I picked up weight around that time as well so in school I was already being singled out because of my uniqueness and my weight problems luckily for me I was saved by them switching me out of public school until I hit middle school...

    Middle School (12-15) : I was back in the public where day one of classes I was the target of all the bullying I was beat up constantly and always alone then the people that would talk to me were only out for my money or stuff in general with no friends or support from my family my mom & pops were going through a financial spiral and I was the scapegoat and started feeling like they would be better off financial and be happy again without my existence so I started to become a sucidal outcast at this point...

    High School (15-19) : The literal end of any hope I had for a better future I was different, short, had acne, no friends, fat, and while everybody else was noticing girls I starting looking at guys nobody to talk to about it the fear of adding another problem to my plate wasn't even an option plus my grades started to fall as I grew detached from it all this got progressively worse until I snapped I tried suicide and almost got away with it if it wasn't for my sister in this moment after I got out of the hospital things started to change I got my 1st group of friends and for once people were nice to me but then my sister passed and I nearly lost myself again my friends I'm glad for them I pulled a win out my ass because of them...

    After Years (19-now) : I fought for a year with my sexuality and finally came out my family ties are pretty much dead except immediate family but I felt better about myself I lost my weight and learned to get over my past but I just can't find a way to actually just say I'm worth a dime my depression has finally ended I just don't know what to do from here
     
  2. jeanie

    jeanie Guest

    You're just going to have to take it one day at a time. I also have a bit of a problem with self-worth, but as time passes and I'm focusing on school and friends it's getting better. Just remember that the people in your life right now care about you, and to them you're valuable, even if you can't always see it.

    I'm sure since you were in a hospital that you've had counseling, but if you're no longer in counseling you should try to get back to it, and if you're still in counseling mention this issue to your therapist.
     
  3. Momigi

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    I don't know though I can't bring myself to go back to counselling since I'm not sad anymore I just can't see the light that I know everybody has inside myself. I have like the highest degree of respect for everybody else around me but the support or care that I get is so misplaced on me like I'm numb too it I think it might be wasteful for counseling
     
  4. JackAttack

    JackAttack Guest

    Hi Momigi

    Sorry to hear about your tough time growing up, I too had a bad time at school. You have been through a lot in life, so you should give yourself a lot of credit for getting through it all and by what you said, things are looking up. You have friends who care about you, lost weight, came out and moved on from your past and depression. You should be proud with yourself.

    I have always liked the quote of what doesn't kill you, makes you stronger. I advise you to keep this in mind because I think your tough life has made you a stronger person, you just need to realize that your better than you think you are. Therefore you are worth something, especially to your family and friends.

    Also, Jeanie is right about getting back into counselling, they will give you a positive perspective on your situation. They helped me a lot, with my problems. The counselling will not be wasteful on you, their there to help people regardless of their problems. Mine gave me a lot of self worth.

    All the best mate :slight_smile:
     
  5. Ettina

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    Depression isn't always about feeling sad. If you can't feel happy, that can be depression too.