Hey I really want to be a blood donor since a donor saved a friends life. However I have heard Men who have sex with Men have restrictions placed upon us. I believe its a year without sexual intercourse, however how to they verify this? I am monogamous and so is my partner (I trust him) and we are both clean of anything so why can't I give blood? Isn't it discriminatory? Would I get in trouble if I just didn't disclose my sexuality? The blood is screened, and Straight people are almost as likely to have a STD
The law is you cannot donate blood if you have had oral or anal sex with a man in the past 12 months if you are also male. Obviously it would be illegal to lie when they ask this questions. Whether or not it would be immoral to lie if it allows you to give blood and save a life is another question. As to how they'd check if you were lying, I have no idea. Anyway; if you do decide to lie, get tested again before you do just to make sure you're not carrying something.
The issue AFAIK is not STDs, but HIV, which gay men are statistically more likely to have. Of course I don't need to give you the "just because you trust your partner doesn't mean you're both clean and everyone else should trust you" speech. Technically, yes, it's discriminatory, but for a good reason IMO. If you were to give HIV+ blood to someone else, in trying to "save" them you effectively do the exact opposite. It's a safety precaution, though perhaps outdated. I don't know about the regulations for your specific area though. Perhaps a Google search for your local clinic would help?
In essence, there is nothing that anyone can to do stop you from donating. The law is in place in order to be used in case you do end up giving HIV to someone. Most places will only ask if you had had sex with a men between a specific amount of time. As long as you put "no" then there is no way for them to check. That being said, when was the last time you got tested with your partner? If the answer is longer than 6 months then really think about what you are about to do. If the answer is more than a year then stop thinking about it. If you haven't gotten tested and still want to donate then keep in mind that HIV takes 3 months to be detectable by the most common tests.
The blood is screened, but like the others have said, it can take a considerable length of time for the standard HIV tests to test positive after exposure. Most people will test positive within 3 months of exposure, but it can take up to 6 months to test positive for a small percentage of people. The "12 month rule" is in effect for activities that are considered to have statistical higher risks of HIV exposure. This includes M/M sex, but also certain type of intravenous needle exposure, including drug use, receiving a tattoo, or getting a body piercing that used a needle. I've given blood before (my "man virginity" is still in tact, haha), and there's actually a very lengthy questionnaire of "high risk" activities that they make you go through before donating. You may have to sign something at the end that says something to the effect of you swear this information is truthful under penalty of law, although I can't remember for certain. The only way they'd really know if you were lying though is if you were infected, and then passed that infection on to someone unfortunate enough to receive your blood. So although the practice may be a bid discriminatory, it's set up to err on the side of protecting the patient. "Sorry, I trusted my partner," is cold comfort to the person that may be on the receiving end of a tainted blood donation.
If you're certain you're free of all STIs, just check the box that says you haven't had sex. It's only a mere white lie that could help save a further 3 lives. All blood donated goes through rigorous testing, they don't just hand it out willy-nilly.