I need some help and some advice and guidance. I feel so confused. When I was maybe 13 or 14 I was so convinced that I was bisexual, and I came out to my friends, but than I got a bit older and thought maybe i was wrong, I had read in a Dolly article that its normal for teenagers to have desires towards the same sex during puberty so I thought that's just what it is. I'm 17 now, nearly 18 and I stay awake nearly every night questiining myself. I've gotten more experience with girls now, drunk and sober, but mostly drunk. I've had the option of both a guy and a girl in the same night, and I brushed the guy off and went back to hooking up with the girl. My friend and i went down on each other when we were drunk and i enjoyed it, and shes now bisexual. When I watch porn I only watch lesbian porn and as I've gotten older i can picture myself with a girlfriend, whereas before I couldn't, I actually find myself longing to have a girlfriend. I don't know if this is a phase, or if its just the fact that I feel more comfortable around girls because I understand girls and girls understand me, sharing the same body and insecurities. I feel like I'm too young to be making decisions like this and my parents would probably agree if I tell them, especially since they've said before that they don't think being bisexual is a legit thing. I just need help, how do I know? I'm sick of questioning myself and I don't have anyone ti talk to, anyone wanna help? :/
You dont have to make any decisions about your sexualty now or never. you dont have to pick a sick or even to be in the middle. If you feel like being with girls now go for it. that doesnt mean you have t only girls. Sexuality is no exact. I felt like this when i was your age and as the years passed i realized how much time i wasted on going crazy about it. dont worry about labels worry about doing what you want.
Well... Are you sexually / physically attracted to guys? Are you romantically / emotionally attracted to guys? It sounds like you like girls, at the very least. Can you see yourself with a guy in the future? How about with a girl? Thinking about these questions, and what may seem to be the right answers for you, will help you understand your attractions to others much more. You're not too young to be trying to understand your sexuality. Teenage years are common, in fact, for people to try to experiment and test the boundaries of their attractions to others. I can't give you a clear-cut answer, but it sounds like you at least like girls.
I am definitely sexually attracted to guys, but I can't go deeper with them emotionally. Up until now I haven't felt the need to put a label on it but I feel like lately my sexuality is being questioned by not only myself but by my friends and family and it's confusing me. In the future I see myself settling with a guy but lately I've been wanting to be with a girl and taking a lot more interest into girls. I know in attracted to girls in a way because I've been with girls both sober and drunk and enjoyed it both times and I also know I'm attracted to guys... Ugh it's just so confusing! I just wish someone could just flat out tell me D:
Katie, first off, bisexuality is legit, a bisexual talking here secondly, there is such a thing as a "lean", what it basically means is, you're attracted to both genders but you have a bigger lean of attraction towards one particular (in your case, and in mine for that matter, it's girls). I tend to get easily connected with women more then men, but that doesn't make my attraction towards guys disappear. It's totally ok and nothing has to be set in stone. Getting connected on a deeper emotional level is about personality and the person, NOT their sex. So my guess is, girls you are able to connect with are emotionally closer to you then guys. Now maybe some day a guy may come who has a softer, more feminine side about it, or who understands you like no other. But until that day (should it ever happen) you would never know so what's really the point to question yourself and bust your head about it and be so nervous? Sexuality is fluid, you don't own anyone anything, except for yourself - so give yourself a break and just try to enjoy life and just be. I hope this helps, but I tend to be the same way you are explaining. YES there are guys I really like and I wouldn't mind hooking up with them but personality wise we just don't click, yet at least. Also, I don't "See" myself with a certain sex in the future. It's not their sex that matters, it's who they are, who you fall in love with. And whoever questions you it's their problem, not yours, honestly people can be really cruel sometimes don't give then the benefit of hurting you. It's not worth it. You've got only one life after all - live it, enjoy it.
The key is to make the label fit you, not the other way around. Right now, it sounds like you're definitely bisexual, and possibly more homoromantic. If that's what's working right now, stick with it. Date who you want, go to bed with who you want, and let the label follow you. Lex
Thanks guys, this helps I don't have anyone I feel like I can talk to so it feels really good to get it off my chest. I think I'm just scared to admit my feelings because of what people will say, especially my family. But I guess I just need to stop worrying about everyone else and just let myself feel, so thankyou your responses are really helping. :3 x
It isn't. Most teens only feel sexual attraction to the opposite gender, right from when those feelings start. Sexuality is somewhat more fluid in teens than in adults, but I have yet to hear of someone who came out as bi or gay in their teens and turned out to be completely heterosexual as an adult.
