I'm trying to reach some clarity on something that's started to really bother me. I'm a very loving person, easy to get along with and all over happy girl, but I feel so confused now. My whole life I have believed as humans we have the right to love who we want. Some of my best friends are gay/lesbian and I'm a strong advocate for their happiness. However, for the last few years I have been wondering if the reason I've so strongly advocated for them was because I felt like they do. There is this one girl who I cant help but want. Were friends it scares me that she may have picked up on it, my feelings for her, I stare at her and catch the stares back. I need help. Like the title I've always said you fall for the person and not their parts (male&female) but what kind of person am I if I can't take my own advice. Well I just don't know.
Love is a spiritual thing, not a body gender thing. If it was all about body gender then Mike would never have fallen for me. He would be with a cis woman right now not as happy more than likely. His mom accepted me several months back because she has never seen him this happy and that is out of her mouth. He says he has never in his 37 years felt this way about anyone and he does miss va-jj. He might miss that but everything else makes up for it. June
I know it should not matter, maybe I'm just afraid to admit it to myself that I have fallen for someone who could potentially love me back and only love me back for who I am.
Isn't that the kind of love we all want? You sound like my old FWB from before Mike came up the drive. He is in love with me, but is too afraid to step beyond the sex and friendship. Once Mike came into my life and I had to stop the sex, he then left his GF a day late and a dollar short, who he had been in process of leaving and took the steps too late and even said so many times that he let the best thing he ever found slip away. I told him I still would be there for him and help him move foward. When Mike and I broke-up last month for two weeks he started to court me. Then just as the tention ran high and he was about to pop the question which was freaking me out, he lost his nurve again and the next day ran back to her. I took Mike back in the meantime and he again is kicking himself because he really wants me. This is not uncommon for a cis male that has found me to be the one for him. He will come around but this one waited too long because I am taken now. Think about it how long before she gets taken? June
