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Intimidated by straight girls

Discussion in 'General Support and Advice' started by Britishskittles, May 16, 2013.

  1. Britishskittles

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    So I grew up around straight girls who i am still friends with today but I have trouble making friends with straight girls now I am out , I worry that they will think I fancy them and I am just the gay one to them , it's some how different when I'm friends with Someone then come out rather than becoming friends with girls once they know I am gay , it's mostly groups of very girt girls I feel like I am not good enough to be friends with them and I feel like the odd one out all the time as i don't like to dress up in Girly stuff , I kinda get fed up with hearing about boys and I really don't understand some straight girls , the straight girlfriend I have are kinda Tom boy ish anyway , but I don't have any lesbian friends or straight mail friends so I constantly feel different like the only one in the group who doesn't fit it because when I'm not the only gay one the gay persons male and seems to understand straight girls more than me. Any advice or understanding would be great , thanks
     
  2. I get where you're coming from.
    There's a lot of things that (many, not all) straight women participate in socially that I just do not understand.
    It's highlighted for me in things like baby showers or bachelorette parties (which I have many to attend lately :/)

    Anyway, as for them thinking that you're just going to crush on them, simply tell them that that's not how it works and if they're still uncomfortable then they don't seem like good people to be friends with.

    But the easiest way to make friends it so do things you're interested in and meet people who are interested in that as well. That way, there is always a common ground and it's harder to be the odd one out in that kind of situation.
     
  3. Lamonia

    Lamonia Guest

    I know I am a gay GUY...but I can relate with what you mean with feeling uneasy around the really straight version of the gender...in my case the straight guys...

    I do think saying you are not good enough is not ok, but I know how you feel because they are the normal and you are the outsider that is how it feels/seems anyways...

    What I did after thorough exploration and managing to actually befriend these very straight guys....is that I just went like..honestly I don't want to hang out with that type of guy...I don't have to say that either of us are not good enough, I'd rather be around guys who are geeky or jocky or whatever but who have a lot of non stereotypical qualities, who are confident in being cooky or different...they are the type of people who embrace everything different...

    Sometimes one of those straight guys would complain how he feels everyone is just acting that they are so macho, and imply that he is sick of keeping up or something...I don't want to mean that everyone who is a certain way is pretending...but ya a lot of people talk about very typical things because they are scared of coming across as weird...and I just don't like hanging around that anymore, and I don't feel I am 'not good enough for it' it's just not fun..

    This applies to all cliques or categories, I know it sounds lame and that 'I am just trying to comfort you', but really the odd people are most of the time the most interesting and the most trusted...cause people know they aren't playing a certain social game on them, they are truly being themselves...if they don't like you they won't pretend they do...so my opinion is just be yourself, try to overcome your intimidation and just understand them but you don't have to agree or be them to prove that you understand them you know?...

    My opinion anyways...
     
    #3 Lamonia, May 16, 2013
    Last edited by a moderator: May 16, 2013
  4. myheartincheck

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    "Omigosh he's soooo dreamy..."
    "Check out his abs!"
    "Hey, what kinda guys do YOU like?"
    "Check out this cute purse I bought!"
    "Oooo that's super cute!"
    "Thanks! AND my boyfriend bought me a super cute necklace!"
    "That totally matches your outfit! Let's go buy you a skirt, girl!"

    It's all dribble to me. :dry:
     
  5. Britishskittles

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    . It's not that they think I'm crushing on them it's that I worry that's what they are going to think okay that makes more sense in my head sorry, I've just got to find a hobbie I wish there was some interest I that would help me meet others got to find one

    ---------- Post added 16th May 2013 at 11:25 PM ----------

    . Yep you would think there would be more interesting things to talk about
    I just don't get it

    ---------- Post added 16th May 2013 at 11:27 PM ----------

    I respect you for being able to be yourself in a crowd like that but I just can't do it I am to aware of my differences the entire time and I don't wanna be I guess I just have to find people I am comfortable around easier said than done though
     
  6. ForgottenRose

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    I know that feeling except, guy who is intimidated by straight guys..
    They scare me always.
     
  7. Femme

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    I SO miss this! Why can't I find any lesbian or bi women like this? I'm not interested in going biking and playing sports. I know there has to be other bi or lesbian women out there like me but I can't seem to find them. I thought I wouldn't have to do those sports related things when I stopped dating guys.

    I love bachelorette parties too!

    Hate those horrid showers though.
     
  8. Britishskittles

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    I guess cause there less obviously gay , my ex gf is bisexual and leans to both sides when it comes to hobbies too ie likes clothes and watching sex in the city but also watches wrestling and complains about straight girls , and I hate sports as well as shopping I'm more of a culture theatre arty freak , my point is there's plenty of femmes out there they are just harder to find