Hi, so I've had anorexia then bulimia for over a year now, and I'm trying to recover. I haven't starved or purged in just over a week now (which is a massive improvement), but the emotional strain is really getting me. I've gained a bit of weight thanks to binging without purging/starving, and I'm scared of relapsing into anorexia to compensate. I've had three failed recoveries so far, and it always gets worse after a failure. Any advice on how to deal with this? I know it's all in my mind, but I almost had a panic attack when my 28" trousers actually fit well this morning, and panic attacks are what made me relapse last time.
Hey there- It's great to hear you're working towards recovery! I understand that it's really difficult to deal with EDs, which is why my first suggestion would be to get some professional help. If you look on the web, you will probably find a lot of recovery blogs and websites which may be inspirational or help you in bad times. I would try looking and connecting with some other people in recovery as well, so you don't feel you're doing this alone. Panic attacks suck-- sometimes medication can help with them. If you're able to see a doctor, try and explain and they may be able to help you out. Other than that, remember setbacks like panic attacks are temporary responses to stress, not the entirety of your recovery. I've been clean nearly four months and I wish I could tell you it's easy. It's not. Recovery from any addiction is the hardest thing you can do for yourself, and it's alsoone of the best. I feel better in my skin these days. I know you can make it there too.
It's great you're on the road to recovery! It's always lovely hearing that! Agreeing with Eli, a good step would be professional help, maybe a counsellor, someone you can talk to. Friends and family could always play a big role on this. It seems to me you're thinking about it a lot, and you need to just take your mind off of it (Not completely, of course.) I suggest just going out with friends/family and finding someone you can discuss your feelings with, whether it be online or offline! Talking to someone can really help, but you probably already know that. :icon_bigg Best wishes to recovery! (*hug*)
Don't think of it as failing when you recognize the problem and keep trying to solve it. NEDA Navigators | National Eating Disorders Association You can email someone that can help you through the whole process of finding treatment, paying for treatment, finding a support group, or just being an overall mentor for you and guide you through the steps of recovery. They also have an online hotline that works at the hours of their phone hotline. You should check them out--they have helped me a lot. Best of wishes.