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I don't know if want I did was right...

Discussion in 'General Support and Advice' started by XsabercaliberX, Jun 11, 2013.

  1. XsabercaliberX

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    So basically my boyfriend saw someone kiss me even though I didn't kiss back and I told him that it was forced on. He's still being stubborn and wouldn't talk to me for like a week. I told him that if there is no communication between us there is no point of our relationship. I understand if he would talk a little but he won't talk at all. I broke up with him but I don't know if what I did was right.
     
  2. You need to do what you feel is right. Obviously there was a misunderstanding. Maybe he needs a little more time to cool down, but if won't talk to you at all, then you're right. Have you tried emailing?
     
  3. Argentwing

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    I wouldn't have broken up with him. He just needed time for his emotional reaction to cool off and his rational brain to come back to him. Just remind him: every minute he spends giving you the silent treatment is another minute he doesn't have your companionship. The fact that it wasn't your fault is bound to overcome his disgust at just seeing it happen eventually.
     
  4. XsabercaliberX

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    I have but he won't answer.

    ---------- Post added 11th Jun 2013 at 07:27 PM ----------

    I've been trying to explain everything but he kept saying he knew what he saw and what I did. I really have no idea how to talk to him without having to scream at him just because he won't let me say anything. Also I'm afraid if I do scream at him it will turn into an fight but if I don't I can't get my point across.
     
  5. Chip

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    He's obviously hurt and angry and probably really jealous. And jealousy stems from insecurity, which stems from shame.

    So what matters is whether or not it's worth trying to salvage. My gues is he's retreating because he's hurt. The shame already makes him feel like he's not worthy of having anyone good be his boyfriend, and seeing someone kiss you just proves this message that's playing on endless loop in his unconscious.

    But if he won't talk to you, there really isn't much you can do. And, frankly, he probably has a lot of issues he needs to work on, so it might be better to let him go and find a healthier relationship. Ultimately, though, it depends on what you want.
     
  6. XsabercaliberX

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    Thank you I never even thought of these kinds of problems he could have. I try to think back when he first asked me out and said no matter who I was we'd still be friends. At the time I just went through a huge meltdown and he made me feel great. Thank you again I'll reconsider if what I did was right or wrong cuz I don't really know if I'm ready fr a relationship almost as soon as I got out of one. I'm gonna apologize tomorrow and see what happens.