Not LGBT related. Just wanted to tell you that because it's very long and you shouldn't read it unnecessarily. I had a very important English exam today, that will determine if I get into college or not. I've already lost hope about that, or I'd rather not get my hopes up because I know I was terrible at it. It's not that I didn't know how to say it in English, it's just what is there to say about that? I now genuinely believe it is possible for an exam to be so simple that it actually makes it harder to do well in. The topics were not interesting at all and I was very surprised to get so meaningless questions. I thought it was going to be about things like abortion, women's rights, global warming, etc., something you can feel passionate about and would be able to make a good case for why you think they matter. My questions were about nature, technology and hobbies. Basically, they were so ordinary and superficial subjects that I could not say anything interesting about them. And the examiner kept asking me questions, which was no help to me at all. It's very confusing to get sidetracked all the time while you're in an exam and trying to keep up a coherent monologue, which I thought you were supposed to do. In the first part I was supposed to get five questions and answer them on my own. But no, he kept cutting into it with more question. I honestly can't remember how many questions he asked me, or any of his observations, which he was not supposed to make. Anyway, he probably thought he was being helpful but he wasn't. Or maybe he was doing his job and it involved interrupting the student after their every sentence. I'm disappointed because I wanted to do better and I went in there ready to defend my views on human rights, ethics and politics, although that topic is probably not in any exam. I was ready to say 'I'm gay' if the subject of 'my ideal date and partner' came up. And what do I get instead? 'What are some stereotypical women's past time activities?' -Really? And there was this question about hobbies in general and then he said '...but look at the pictures. There are women playing football and doing DIY. That's not stereotypically their job. It wasn't always that way.' -By the way he said these things after each sentence I was trying to string together, with him interrupting all the time. He wasn't supposed to. Anyway, then I started saying that no it wasn't but feminists and suffragettes played a part in it and then he interrupted again. I'm still very angry about it. He wasn't supposed to talk all the time. The second part was a debate so then he could talk, but not in the other two parts. It's so annoying how badly I messed it up. That made me realize, I'm just really shit at English. It's disappointing because I imagined I was going to go in there and say what I think and being able to say it as well. Maybe I really suck at this. I know I might be worrying about this unnecessarily because if these were the kind of questions you ask then the standard can't be that high either, so I might not have completely messed things up but I won't know that for sure until Monday. It sucks because there weren't that many points overall, which means it's a lot easier to lose points. And I don't know if the % of this is added to the writing part and then the overall % is calculated or if the points from both parts are added up and then that would give the final score. I really hope it's the second option. This whole converting points into percentages and then into points again is so complicated! I can count so that's not the problem but it's a lot of conversions! Please tell me honestly, am I terrible at English? I know it's writing, which is different than speaking but still, how bad am I? ---------- Post added 12th Jun 2013 at 05:34 PM ---------- I've had these kind of exams before. One of them was supposed to be harder than this and it was still easier because they let me talk. That was the whole point. Not giving any help. Apparently not this time, when it actually mattered what the % was and not whether I passed or not. I know he was only trying to help but...I wish he didn't. It was like he didn't even let me go in any direction with what I was about to say. It was controlled, like every sentence. And that's just not how it's usually done, or at least not in my experience. Anyway, I'll shut up now. But I still can't help asking myself 'Was it really his fault, or mine?'.
You seem to be doing fine to me (*hug*). You're writing it pretty fluently. Hope your results come back good
