Afraid of my family's expectations??!

I am not a parent .. But you mother's reaction sounds quite unhelpful. Whilst you are quite young, I would hope she develops an interest in you achieving an "authentic" life and not to force you in any one particular direction other than what is right for YOU.

I am sure others here will give better comments...

Xx

 

(*hug*)

Your mothers comments show that she really lacks information on the subject, and also that she is worried about your future. Try to calmly (and kindly) tell her that this isn`t exactly something you would have chosen if you could choose to begin with. Tell her you know life can be harder as a gay man, but you couldn`t change who you are if you really tried, and her support and love is important to you. Kindness breeds kindness, most of the time. Approaching her in this manner might help sway her into a more thoughtful way of acting and speaking about it. Keep in mind that she isn`t trying to hurt you (at least it doesn`t sound that way to me), but is simply not understanding the concept very well.

You could buy or borrow an LGBT book, or get a hold of some brochures and leave it somewhere in the house, so that she`s bound to find it and hopefully gain some insight.

I found a text on this page How to Accept That Your Child is Homosexual or Bisexual: 8 Steps that you could print out and leave by the toilet, kitchen counter, etc. Somewhere she`d be bound to see it. There`s tons of places where she can gain information, but she might need a small nudge.

Realize that your child has been through an incredible struggle. Concealing homosexuality and facing prejudice can both be extremely difficult, especially in high school. Be aware of the suffering they have experienced, and be proud and supportive of their ability to accept themselves.
If you believe that your child "chooses" the lifestyle he/she is living, and could just as well choose a heterosexual lifestyle, ask yourself: Who would voluntarily choose a life marked by fear of discovery, discrimination, and isolation by classmates, friends, colleagues, and family? Would you choose to live in circumstances that made your life a lot more difficult and keep it that way just for the heck of it? Do you still think they would if they could just as well be easily accepted by you and their environment? Did you "choose" to be straight?
Although it may be hard at first, realize that your son or daughter is the same person that they always were and this is just another part of them.
Consider that even though you may think your child's feelings or actions are "wrong", they are as natural to him or her as it is for you to feel attracted to or to love your partner. How would you feel if someone told you holding your partner's hand in public or spending time with him/her was unacceptable or worse?
Listen to your child. Don‘t ignore anything they have to say. Remember, this is a big secret your child has been hiding for a while, so they need to say something.
Your child knows better than anyone else who they want and are attracted to. Even if your child comes out late in life, does not fit the stereotypes that you have in mind for people who are LGBT, or had apparent kid-crushes on the opposite sex when they were younger, this does not mean that your child is actually strictly heterosexual, and refusing to take their word for it on their identity may damage the relationship you have with them permanently.
If your religious beliefs discourage certain aspects of homosexuality, discuss with your child what this will mean for them. Prepare them for any discrimination they could face within your religious community, and let them know about any lifestyle choices they will be expected to make (this could include chastity, not making their homosexuality publicly known, etc depending on your religious beliefs). Understand that this may cause them to leave a faith.

And don`t be discouraged if it takes time. It`s a big thing for a parent to accept, considering her head right now is probably filled with all sorts of scary scenario`s, you might get discriminated against, you might catch a disease, you might get hurt, etc. She`s probably panicking a bit and she is going to need time, but I understand that her initial reaction has hurt you a lot (*hug*) Most of the time, a reaction like this passes with time and knowledge, so try not to be scared. She`ll most likely come around, as her reaction, hurtful as it was, sounded within "the normal negative". You could consider it a bit like an emotional reflex, her worst fear became reality, and she didn`t deal with it very well.

(*hug*) It will be okay.

 

I'm a parent, and I could not imagine saying the things that your Mom said to you to my sons, if either of them were gay. I think your Mom needs to be educated because she sounds very silly. She obviously has no idea what it means to be gay and I'm so sorry. Now, about your friends; I think you should come out to them, but only if you're ready.

I know what it is like to be in high school, so please think about it. When I got to high school, all of the friends I thought I had were too busy trying to be popular. And when I was growing up, being LGBT was a trend and not really taken seriously. I was also incredibly terrified to be myself, so I give you a ton of credit. Just give it time, and if you feel like you cannot keep this from the people you care about then tell them.